Ever since the month we spent in Swaziland, I have been itching for some ministry in a hospital or anything dealing with sick people so that we could see some miraculous healing. When we received our set up sheet for Month 8 we were placed at a hospital. My excitement grew with the possibility of what could take place. Sadly, that month came and passed and I stepped foot in the hospital once. We did our fair share of praying, but no healing- that I know of. But it isn’t about what I do…I can’t heal. I can’t take away pain or sickness. God can. God did. And I don’t need to be there for it to happen.
I sucked down these lessons as we departed from Swaziland with excitement for what Europe would hold.
Romania and Moldova passed by in a blur. God is evident on all the continents we have visited without a doubt. We have been blessed to see him in different people, places, cultures, and languages.
We entered Ireland with no clue what it would look like for our squad of 55 to live and serve together. I glanced down at the list of ministries we would be going to during our final month. I flipped through the pages of schedules and there it was…
Healing on the streets.
Excuse me? What is this? Is this what I think it is, actually healing people on the streets.
Well, it didn’t take my mind long to run circles around the possible ideas of what this entailed. My team leader quickly announced an all squad training session for the Saturday event of healing on the streets. My excitement built as fear crept in. This is what I have been waiting for. We experienced a bit of healing at our training camp, but that never filled my desire – I wanted more.
I think my desire to see healing helps me believe there is a God. Isn’t that crazy? I need to see healing take place to believe in the God that creates life in 9 months in a woman. I need to see healing to believe in the God that paints the world with mountains, rivers, valleys, trees, flowers and humanity. I need to see healing to believe in the God who has provided, protected and guided my 11 month journey. Because all the other stuff just doesn’t prove it enough. (Ya, we all have our faults ;))
I think as much as you want to point the finger at me and say, “How dare you!” with judgment written all over your face that I can’t just simply believe, you may want to take a second and think about it yourself. Have you had those moments that you want to test God? Have you had those moments where you are talking to someone and all you want God to do is bring down a lightning bolt in front of you just to prove your point to that person? Don’t you want to see those miraculous signs and wonders that the Bible talks about with burning bushes? Well, I will let you have a moment to think about your desire to see God.
Even as I write this miles away from each of you, I can tell that you want to fight me. Have it be, but I will tell you that I love God will all my being. I have given my life to serve and love God with my whole heart in whatever he asks me to do. I have believed in him since I was a child, seeing him or not. I didn’t grow up in a church where we even talked about healing, let alone saw it. But I have grown in my belief of God’s sovereignty. I believe that God is bigger and better than anything and everything on Earth and in Heaven. He is bigger than sickness and he is better than medicine. I believed in him SO much that I wanted to experience his healing. Yes, I can’t leave out that it would help me in my humanly need “to see to believe”, but I also know that if healing would take place I would need to use what I didn’t see-my knowledge of God’s power- to really know the healing took place.
Okay, okay, back to the story about healing on the streets. So we all attended our training and we were ready to take to the streets. The first Saturday was fast approaching with a few of us signed up to be in the town square with a few chairs set up. My mind was drowning in questions. What am I doing? How am I going to do this? How am I going to touch people and proclaim healing?
I left early that Saturday to stop at a coffee shop to meet with the Lord before we would encounter the day together. My mind was still mulling over millions of questions. What am I doing? How am I going to do this? How am I going to touch people and proclaim healing?
YOU wont.
I looked around the coffee shop thinking someone had said something to me. I started to flip through the pages of my Bible, thinking…
What am I doing? How am I going to do this? How am I going to touch people and proclaim healing?
YOU wont.
There it was again. Who was speaking to me?
YOU won’t heal anyone. YOU won’t defeat sickness or beat cancer. YOU won’t grow arms or eradicate pain. I WILL! I am the Alpha and Omega. I am the Great Physician. I am the Author of Life and have stamped out death through my Son. It isn’t you. I will give you my power and authority to heal in my name and through my power.
I start my walk towards town center with my heart beat increasing. My eye catches the large waving banner that reads “Healing”. I take a deep gulp; I question what I got myself into. What am I doing? How am I going to do this? How am I going to touch people and proclaim healing?
I stop dead in my tracks.
I am sorry Lord. Again, it isn’t about me. I am one with you today. I am your ambassador. I am the hands and feet of the Lord today.
I kept repeating it in my head. I am one with the Lord. I am one with the Lord.
We started to hand out healing flyers and asking people if they needed any healing for anything. We had a couple takers. I was asked to go pray over one man who drove up in his car.
“This is Bearnie. He has come every Saturday for the last 3 years for healing.”
Are you kidding? My first encounter with someone was with someone who has come for 3 years. What was this about? I am here to see miracles, and I am sitting with an older man who suffers with more than I could remember and who hasn’t been healed, yet still comes every Saturday faithfully.
Ha. God had bigger plans for me that day. I needed to be put in the right place.
I kneel down at the side of his door. Bearnie started to talk to us about what was ailing him. He told us about his life at home and his family. He also told us why he comes every Saturday.
“God WILL heal me. I know full well that God will heal me.”
I was in shock. I couldn’t say anything. In my heart I wanted to agree, but I was so mad that this man hadn’t already been healed because of his dedication to calling on the Lord for healing for 3 years.
I WILL heal him my daughter. Don’t worry about when or how. I told you already that I have the power and authority over sickness and pain. I have defeated death through my son.
There was that voice again. I knew it was God speaking to me. I was at peace talking to Bearnie. We began to pray for Bearnie and placed our hands on the areas that he was struggling with. As we prayed, I knew just like he did that he would be healed. I don’t know when. I don’t know how. I don’t know if it was in front of me or if it would be in another year. I know that he will be healed. I know that God’s power will be made perfect in Bearnie’s weakness. If Bearnie walks through this life coming every Saturday and never sees healing on Earth, I know that he will have healing when Christ’s name is proclaimed for all to hear and we join together in worship and praise in Heaven. That is enough healing for me. Bearnie’s dedication to believing Christ would heal him showed me the sovereignty of the Lord. God is bigger than everything, even the end of the world. God lasts forever.
He will bring all things together for the good of those who love him! Just like Bearnie.
I came hoping for a miraculous sign….and well, I got one.
I saw the miracle of life. Bearnie’s life.
