If you would have talked to me a year ago you would have probably labeled me as a cynic, or maybe even a couple days ago. I am a big believer in people knowing the history and meaning behind anything, even Holidays. That’s why I’ve never really enjoyed Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, or even my Birthday, really. I respect them for their initial statements and celebration of people but as our society turns these once highly regarded holidays into a way to gain money and/or drink senselessly I usually try and keep my distance. But as I grow closer to God I find a new meaning in Valentine’s Day.
It wasn’t even until this morning after an unexpected phone call followed by a visit at work. The best and sweetest friends are always the most unlikely people, aren’t they? You never know nor can imagine how important someone will become when you initially meet them. This particular friendship started at the beginning of the year, all starting with car rides and great conversation. A newly added sister to my sorority and a sister to a good friend, Makaila and I grew fast and quick into our friendship. This morning this amazing friend called me when I had just settled into work and suggested we get breakfast, I told her I had work. Then, she asked if I had eaten breakfast and when I said I didn’t but I brought popcorn to eat throughout my shift she found that unsuitable and proceeded to insist on bringing me breakfast and coffee (she knows me too well). It was barely 20 minutes later she comes into the Beach Museum of Art with coffee and breakfast and, naturally, her brightness and cheerfulness only comparable to the sun. What amazing surprises God gives you when you think it’s just a regular day. An hour and a half later my day was changed from ordinary to extraordinary and joyful (thank you, Makaila).
It’s things like this that my eyes have been opened to in the past couple of days. From cuddles on the couch with my 10 year long best friend and roommate, going out two-stepping last night, hanging at my friends house surrounded by women I am in fellowship with, a phone call from Houston from my best friend and sorority sister, a phone call from Lubbock from a World Race teammate, coffee yesterday afternoon with one of the most kind, funny, caring people I know, to a phone call from Austin from my best friend from High School, God has opened my eyes. I am loved and I am blessed. I knew by Him but I had no idea to what extent the people around me do. I can hear God’s voice saying, “Look at my beautiful daughters that fill your life, look at the love they provide”. How could I have missed this?
My friend and I who are in discipleship together are going through the fruits of the spirit by looking up all the verses in the Bible that mention them. This week we looked at “love”, how fitting, and read all the verses that mentioned love or some form of the word in the Bible. God opened doors and my eyes to explanations and uses of the word with His Word, it was like seeing love from God’s perspective. Reading the story of love through the narrative of the Bible. Of course, there are even more things that the Bible says and displays about love than just those verse it mentions it in. But this was a great snapshot for our one-on-one fellowship.
Another reason you might view me as a cynic is I cannot stand chick-flicks, Nicholas Sparks movies, or any other type of lovey-dovey film. The reason? I believe society portrays love and relationships extremely inaccurately (don’t get me started on the bachelor). There are all these preconceived notions about how girls should act, boys should act, how relationships should be, what love is, ect. I really could go on about just this subject for hours but I think you get the idea. It’s a false and inaccurate representation of true and real love. True and real love is this…
“When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished“, and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.” John 19:30
These beliefs and views aside, I used to be an actual cynic of love. After having multiple people pass away in my life after a very short period of time and going through a painful breakup my senior year of high school I clung to the belief that “There is no point in love because people either hurt you, they leave you, or they die”. Dark, right? I didn’t realize at the time how sad that statement truly is. At the time I thought I was being a realist. The dark place I was in only grew and lead me down a path that I never should have followed. I lost my way, I left the path of love, and closed off my life and my heart to most, if not everyone. The pain grew as more people in my life continued to pass away during my time in college. Friends, family, and family friends were lost and it felt like the love in my life was disappearing. Somehow, some way I found my way stumbling back to God and the path that lead towards Him. What a path and stumble it was, and is at times. I am not perfect but I am surrounded by His perfect love. Love and lives may be lost from those around us but the perfect love of the Father will never leave us and He always provides people in our lives to love on us. Life without love isn’t much of a life at all. Those dark times in my life was from the lack of the Father and following Him but to sum it up, it was dark because I wasn’t being filled by His love.
The beauty and depth of His love is always displayed in unique ways but the way I am learning to appreciate recently is His love reaching me through people in my life. The words I type cannot do justice to my new perspective or how I feel. Some people describe the loss of that lovey feeling in a relationship as taking off rose colored glasses. This feeling is more like, for my fellow contact wearers, as putting on a new pair of contacts only to realize how dirty and unclear the other pair was and feeling like a whole other world is in front of you. That’s the best metaphor I can give to this feeling.
2016, for me, has been the year of love. A lot of people learn and fall in love with God but I believe that right now God is showing me love and opening my eyes to the love in my life. From friends loving on me and softly forcing me to celebrate my birthday (which I usually hate), to the day-to-day, to friends miles and miles away displaying their love in unique and amazing ways, to my family who loves and supports me so deeply that I can’t even fathom sometimes (thank you mom and dad).
Love is all around us, waiting for us to open the door and let it in, and His name is Jesus. What are you waiting for?
HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY!!!!!*
*from a labeled cynic 😉
