If I were asked to name one thing I've learned since being on the World Race, it would be to surrender ALL of your expectations.
From the moment training camp began, we were presented with opportunities to surrender our expectations; we also learned how to cope when our expectations were not met.
I am currently in month 9 of the Race and I have had many opportunities to surrender and re-surrender my expectations. I've learned to lower or eliminate my expectations all together and I've learned how to deal with my frustrations when expectations aren't met.
As a team we continually remind each other to have NO EXPECTATIONS!
Coming into the Parent Vision Trip week, I honestly wasn't sure what to expect. To some degree I expected to deal with a lifetime-worth of issues and problems – such as lack of communication. I thought we would address our issues and everything would be better.
In the past I've always avoided talking about the hard things – now I seem to desire the very thing I once dreaded!
During the 8 months I've been on the Race I've learned to value family and a new desire of mine is to invest in my relationship with my parents and siblings.
During a meeting with parents and racers on our first full day together, our leaders asked us to explain what FEEDBACK is.
Feedback is giving someone positive and constructive feedback. It is a way to "CALL UP, NOT OUT". Feedback, when done right, leaves a person feeling LOVED and ACCEPTED. Before this week, I understood MY desire to feel loved and accepted – This week opened my eyes and allowed me to see how our parents also desire feeling LOVED and ACCEPTED.
They desire honest feedback as much as we, racers, desire feedback. They are open and willing to try this thing called "feedback".
After only one feedback session with my parents, I can see drastic differences in our relationship! Once put into practice with the other members of our family and done on a regular basis, it will have even more profound results.
This week, I realized that Racers are the catalysts for change in our circles of influence. Yes, we are world changers because we've traveled the world telling others about Jesus, but we will continue to be world changers when we go home and implement feedback into our families, friends, and work places!
Within my family, there are conversations we need to have but don't have because the frame work doesn't exist. We haven't created a safe place to give each other feedback. These conversations haven't taken place because we would have been calling each other out, not up! The goal of these hard conversations should never be to put anyone down or make them feel as if they've done something wrong; the goal should always be to CALL THEM UP INTO THE MAN or WOMAN GOD CREATED THEM TO BE.
Now, after this week, I believe my parents understand how feedback works and how to leave others feeling LOVED and ACCEPTED. I believe, together, we can create a safe place to speak life and encourage each other to step into our true identities.
The goal of the Parent Vision Trip is to bring parents and racer together, to join in ministry, and to be a part of what God has been doing. AIM believes that when both parent and racer are open to it, God can do amazing things inter-generationally. There may be some laughter. There may be some tears. There may even be some hard conversations. But, the Race is helping racers step into their identity in Christ and AIM believes that this experience can minister to and transform each family.
After the week with my parents, I believe this goal was met. While there are still issues and problems that haven't been addressed, the framework is being constructed within our family. The race has helped me step into my identity in Christ and this experience is already ministering to my family and will transform the way we operate.
One of my desires for this week was for my parents to acknowledge a visible change within me. While my parents and I were talking one night, they looked at me and asked me what changed in me during the last two and a half years – before that time my life was headed towards destruction. I was living for myself, looking to the world or identity, acceptance and approval. I did the very thing the Bible warns us against, I conformed to the behaviors and customs of the world.
Roughly two and a half years ago, I went on my first mission trip; since then, my life hasn't been the same.
I wasn't quite sure how to answer their question! I can't pinpoint the cause of such a drastic change in my life other than JESUS!!!
After many years of attending church, I finally had a personal experience with God that changed me forever. Before this point, I relied on the faith of my parents rather than developing my own.
Somewhere along the line, I realized living for myself and looking to the world was not cutting it. It left me empty and hurting. At some point, the Lord of lords encountered me and showed me He truly is THE WAY, THE TRUTH, AND THE LIFE. There is no way to the Father except through him.
This week was powerful, it was redemptive, and it bought healing. We were able to look into each others eyes, ask for forgiveness, tell each other what we see in them, and encourage them to step further into a life of abundance found in Jesus.
I am thankful for the opportunity to minister WITH my parents; however, I am more thankful for the opportunity to minister TO my parents. It was powerful to look into their eyes and say….
"This may be the way you've been operating, but this is not the person God created you to be. You are a man / woman of _________ (fill in the blank) …."
