This past weekend I was at a youth retreat called Pitch and Praise. I had gone with my youth group for several years while I was in high school, and even though I'm definitely too old to be going as a youth anymore, why the heck wouldn't I go to hang out? I swear, half the people at this youth retreat are way past the point where they're considered "youth"… But it seems like the older we get, the more we enjoy Pitch and Praise!
Anyways, one of the speakers for the weekend was named Anne Jackson. She's the author of a book called "Permission to Speak Freely", which is about the importance of making our churches more like the body of Christ – more of a place to be able to go and be vulnerable and broken, and to find healing in Jesus in the church rather than the judgment that normally happens in the church. I loved what she had to say – she freely shared her testimony and spoke openly about her past of drug addiction and sexual abuse. One of the nights that she spoke, she referred to a passage in 2 Samuel. 2 Samuel chapter 11 is the story of King David and Bathsheba – I'm sure you have all heard of this story. David sees this beautiful woman one night bathing on her roof and promptly sends for her and sleeps with her, which results in her getting pregnant. Big oopsie on David's part, that's for sure. One minor detail… Bathsheba is also married to Uriah, who is part of David's army. So out of selfishness and his own guilt, he sends Uriah out to the frontlines in a battle (which is the most dangerous place to be, obviously), and to top it all off he commands his army to pull back and leave Uriah out front and centre so that he for sure gets killed. When David hears about Uriah's death, he then sends for Bathsheba and marries her. Right after he has her husband killed! As you can imagine, God wasn't too happy about that one…
In 2 Samuel chapter 12, God sends a prophet named Nathan to talk to David. God says through Nathan in verses 10-12, "And now, because you treated God with such contempt and took Uriah the Hittite's wife as your wife, killing and murder will continually plague your family. This is God speaking, remember! I'll make trouble for you out of your own family. I'll take your wives from right out in front of you. I'll give them to some neighbor, and he'll go to bed with them openly. You did your deed in secret; I'm doing mine with the whole country watching!" God is serious about sin – when we sin against Him, He will punish us. This is the discipline that we as humans need. Discipline is God's way of restoring us to fellowship with Him. David realizes later on in the chapter that He indeed had sinned against His Lord, and that He deserves to be punished, as it says in verse 14: "But because of your blasphemous behavior, the son born to you will die." But the beautiful thing about God is that even though He needs to discipline us when we sin, He loves us so much that He forgives us: "… God forgives your sin. You won't die for it.​" (2 Samuel 12:13).
David finds out that his and Bathsheba's baby is sick and dying. His servants try everything they can think of to console him, but he won't even accept food from them. It says in 2 Samuel 12:16 that "David prayed desperately to God for the little boy. He fasted, wouldn't go out, and slept on the floor". David is distraught – he begs God to save the baby. But seven days later, David finds out that the baby has died. God followed through with His punishment for David. And you know what David does in response to this? Instead of sulking and being angry with God, he cleans himself up, changes his clothes, and goes to worship the God who just allowed his baby to die. His servants question him and ask why he's suddenly okay with the fact that he lost a child. In response, he says to them, "While the child was alive… I fasted and wept, thinking God might have mercy on me and the child would live. But now that he's dead, why fast? Can I bring him back now? I can go to him, but he can't come to me" (2 Samuel 12:22-23). David accepts God's punishment. He realizes that was God's discipline for what he had done and he takes responsibility for his sin. He finds comfort in the fact that he is forgiven by God, and in his punishment, he turns to God. Near the end of the chapter, God reveals His amazing grace by blessing David and Bathsheba with another baby – Solomon. This is His way of showing that David is forgiven and still loved. God is in no way condoning David's sins, but He has forgiven them. What a beautiful story of grace and forgiveness.
No matter how many times I hear over and over that I am forgiven for my sins, I am still blown away by the things that God has forgiven in my life. All I need to do is accept His forgiveness – the ball is in my court.
