I’ve been applying to colleges since I’ve been on the Race. One of these prospective colleges is Wheaton College in Wheaton, Illinois. It is a private, Christian university with a mission-mindset. Most people who go to Wheaton go with the intent of going into ministry after graduating. Part of the application process was writing an essay. There were two prompts to choose from, and I chose “Pick a topic of experience and write an essay that reveals something about who you are.” After writing this essay, a couple squadmates edited it to see if I could improve. I took their advice, and I believe that this essay is one that really speaks to who I was and who I am. I just wanted to share this with y’all as a blog. Enjoy!
Who am I? To be honest, I am just now figuring that out. One thing that reveals who I am right now is this journey I am taking, called the World Race. I am specifically involved in the gap-year program. It lasts for nine months, and I am traveling with fifty people to four countries – Costa Rica, South Africa, Thailand, and Myanmar. As I continue on this adventure, I realize that this is the time that I can be whoever I want to be. In high school, I accepted the title of “nerd,” “band/theater geek,” and anything math related. I took pride in those titles because I placed my value in those roles. Within those areas of high school, I felt accepted and included. Now, as I join this journey with fifty other people my age, I no longer have those titles to fall back on. I feel like a newborn in this new stage of life. I am no longer different from people my age because we are all striving for the same goal – to spread the gospel of Christ. We all have our own personal goals, but we have this ultimate intention. For me, I decided to embark on this because I had no desire for college right after high school. I needed a break from school, and this seemed like a good outlet. I have been in this new way of life for two months now, and I am just now figuring out who I really am. I discover new things about myself as I live away from comfort. I can make my own decisions without needing the approval of anyone else. I am free to make choices and take responsibility for those choices. For example, I chose to end the relationship with my father because of its toxic nature. Because of that choice, I do not have a earthly father to rely on, but instead, I have a never-changing Father in his stead. I now view God as my father. He is who I turn to and who I ultimately rely on. That choice, though heartbreaking, has increased my dependence on the Lord, along with this current way of life. This journey shows my stay-within-the-lines personality that I can break free from the mold that I have made for myself. I once limited myself to the mindset of the traditional high school senior, being “You have to go to college once you graduate.” Because of this gap year, I realize that it is better to make your own path and walk it out in your own time. This is my life, and I now have the freedom to plan out my goals and achieve them in the time I desire. I truly believe that God led me to this adventure. If I had already been accepted to a university, I would not have given the World Race a second thought. Because I have taken this course, I believe that I am different. I know everyone has their unique differences, but this sets me apart from the general population. I am someone who will follow the Holy Spirit wherever He leads. Even when I experience uncertainty of my future, I know He will direct my steps and lead me where He wants me to go ultimately in His timing. So, the ultimate question remains – who am I? I am a woman stepping into her future, living as a daughter, princess, and warrior of Christ.
