A couple of weekends ago, I took a roadtrip with my pup to visit one of my best friends who lives in San Marcos, TX.
My Boy, Kliff:)
My Friend, Mackenzie:)
I'm just going to be honest – My track record of past San Marcos visits has not been the best, use your imagination. But like I said, God has transformed my heart within the last 6-7 months. He has made me new. So I was looking forward to this weekend getaway, lots of catch up time over coffee and yummy food with my best friend in the hill country. I arrived Friday night, and Mack told me that a group of her friends were in Austin on a cute street with several coffee shops, and she asked me if I was down. Austin. Cute street. Coffee. Of course I was down. However, by the time Mack and I ate dinner and talked for a couple of hours, her friends had moved on from the cute Austin street full of coffee to THAT street. Being the amazing friend that she is and knowing my heart so well, she informed me that her friends were having a chill night at a laid-back bar on the end of 6th Street, and that if I didn't feel comfortable going there, we could do something else. #1. I've never been to 6th Street. #2. I'm a girl who loves her shuffle board. And like I said, I'm not the same girl I was 6-7 months ago. So as I was getting dressed, I told myself over and over that I wanted to please the Lord, that I wanted to be faithful to Him. We finally arrived at Buffalo Billiards, and after one beer and just watching a game of shuffle board, the group decided to move on down the street, which is when Mack looked at me and in a whispered voice said, "I had no idea dirty 6th was in the plans. I'm sorry." I immediately knew that I could say, "Hey, let's go get an early morning breakfast," and she would have been fine with that, but instead, we began to walk deeper into the street with the rest of the group. And that's when it happened. All of those fears I had while getting ready that night, those fears of "messing up," vanished, and in their place was brokenness. I can't describe to you in words what all my eyes took in as we began to make our way further and further down this street. As I looked at the lady on the corner with a sign that read, "I need money for weed," and as I looked at the homeless man lying in filth, and as females walked by me in outfits that didn't cover near enough, and as I heard the disrepectful murmurs from men about their bodies, and as the music blared, and as I smelled the alcohol, I became broken. In that moment, Jesus was breaking my heart for what breaks His. This wasn't about having to try to please the Lord anymore or having to try to be faithful to Him, that wasn't the challenge at all, because at this moment God had taken over my heart and was breaking it for one street in one city in Texas that was living in sin, that was living separate from Him. It was in that moment that I truly understood what the Lord has saved me from. Because 6-7 months ago, I might have smoked the weed if someone had of put it in front of me, I might have mocked the homeless man, I might have been the female walking down the street in not near enough clothes, and those disrepectful men might have been filling my head with lies, and the music might have made me dance with a stranger who would have been touching me inappropriately, and I know for certain that I would have been blacked out drunk. God has rescued me. "God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day." God is my strength. There is nothing good in me except for Him. He sent His son as a living sacrifice, and Jesus died on the cross to save me, and to know me, and to love me. The nails He took, those are my sins. He took them from me and carries them for me and forgives me and makes me new. So no, this isn't about having to try to please the Lord and having to try to be faithful to Him anymore. This is about being so in love with Him that I can't imagine breaking His heart anymore.
Whew, that was just Friday night!! What happened the rest of the weekend? Well…
We are now professional NASCAR drivers, basically.
Then, Mack took me to the best tattoo parlor in town.
Sidenote: I love tattoos. I think when a tattoo has meaning that it's an incredible thing. I look forward to the story this tattoo will tell while I'm on the race.
Final Product<3 So, what does it mean?! Well, I got the cross when I turned 20, and it was meant for accountability (you can go ahead and laugh if you want to). It had faded a lot over the past 4 years (a lot like my relationship with the Lord. Ironic?)…so I got it touched up and added Psalm 46:5, "God is within her," because I have a God who doesn't just walk in front of me or beside me but is within me. The King dwells in me. He is my strength. He is the only good thing about me. Without Him, I would be an ugly mess.
We love because he first loved us. [1 John 4:19]
Jesus didn't just die to save me. He died to save you too. He died to save every heart on 6th Street that Friday night. That's the beauty of it…He has already died for your ugly. And after He died, He rose from the dead…MY SAVIOR LIVES!! All you have to do is bring your mess to Him as is, ask for His forgiveness, continue to seek Him, and you will have life – life here on this earth & eternal life with your Savior in heaven. (If you are reading this blog and don't know Him and have questions OR if you are reading this blog and want to know Him but don't want to go into it alone…if you have my number, call me/text me and if you don't, message me…I would love to pray for you & with you.)
"There is no one more forgiving than Jesus Christ." – JP
Lord, I will use my scars to share Your love. I will use my testimony to bring You glory.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY<3
