One Third of the Way
This past week marked a historic occasion for T Squad: we
are officially one third of the way through the Race. Over the last three and a
half months, we’ve learned many valuable lessons and had some serious team
breakthroughs. All of the stories and examples here are completely fictional
and would, of course, never happen in
real life….. but really. it’s all true. ooo the life of a World Racer.
When in doubt, be
creative. We’ve been living on a budget, and our biggest expense is food,
so we’ve had to learn how to balance health and taste with price. It sounds
easy when you’re living in the third world, but remember, we have egg-sactly
$1.25 per meal. Luckily, we have some egg-cellent chefs on our team, and every
day for lunch we brainstorm a new egg-strodinary masterpiece. Options usually
range from egg sandwiches to egg sandwiches, and occasionally we branch out to
the egg-streme with egg sandwiches (that’s not even an egg-saggeration).
Ok, maybe we eat the same thing every day, but
every day we joke around about how crazy it is that we’re trying something
never even heard of before (yeah, that’s the same joke every day, too…).
Now departing from
procrastination station. Don’t wait till the last day to wash your boxers,
or you won’t have any boxers. And when I say boxers, I mean all manner of
things that should be clean (but never really seem to be). If this is too much
for your team, remember, they’re not showering anyway, so at least it’s equal
opportunity dirt.
Oil has multiple uses.
You can use it to cook egg sandwiches, anoint people, and offend the people
you’re praying for. If someone hands you a bottle of oil, just pray for it, don’t walk around anointing
everyone and his mother. Trust us, it’ll get you run out of the village (and
while we’re on the subject, don’t let your contacts disappear on the night you
make this mistake, lock the keys in the car, and leave you stranded in the
midst of a birthday party where you may or may not be force fed your fourth dinner for the night).
Trust your men.
Sure, sometimes they don’t realize that the two teenage boys in the train
station need to be escorted from the building, but usually they’re great at
warding off the stalkers, reminding us not to hitch hike or walk down dark
alleyways late at night. They’ve learned to watch the front and the back,
they’re stepping into their roles as warriors, and we’re so proud of them (even
if we show it by creeping on them while they pray at night).
Mornings can be
productive. They can include breakfast, teeth brushing, even Bible study.
And don’t shy away from the tough topics- Song of Solomon is a completely
appropriate book to study as the sun rises in a tiny kitchen crammed with
girls, stale cereal and spoiled milk.
There’s no such thing
as too cramped. Did you know that you can actually fit 7 people on a twin
bed or over 50 people in a 12 person bus? Did you know you’re lucky if you can
stand up straight in buses and you’re not forced to sing “Hi ho, I’m six feet
tall, I don’t fit in Nepal”? Embrace moments when you can breathe, because
you’re never guaranteed your next breath. Not only is that Biblically
supported, but now we can vouch for it, too.
It doesn’t matter
what time it is. We never seem to know exactly what day it is, what country
we’re in, or where we’re supposed to be (and even if we did, we’d probably be
late, anyway, and we haven’t even made it to Africa yet!). But one lesson we have learned: when in doubt, it’s always
chai time. Don’t remember the word to the song? Just chai some. Forgot their
names for the seventeenth time straight? Chai again. Concerned we have the
stupidest jokes that we never stop repeating? Just chai to relax, we promise
we’re not as (Considered) Lost as we look. 😉
Don’t forget what
country you’re in. This sounds silly, but it’s actually a lot harder than
it looks. This is important when you have to relieve yourself, because in some
countries it’s perfectly acceptable to do so right on the street, but in others
you may possibly ruin your Christian witness. Some contacts will want you to
wear dresses and head coverings, others will allow pants, still others will
expect modesty and not tell you, and then you’ll show up and realize you’re
dressed completely inappropriately, and then you’ll find out you’re not
speaking anymore. Coincidence? I think not…
Comprehension is over
rated. Just face it, you’re never going to understand what’s going on,
what’s being said, what they mean when they say it, or what they’re really
laughing about. This is borderline comical in group settings, it’s downright
frustrating in five hour conferences with no translator. There are several
steps (12, in fact) you can take to prevent absolute insanity: bring a notebook
and pass- I mean, take notes; pick
the glitter out of your coat; name the 50 states in alphabetical order; plan
your next blog; count the ceiling / floor / wall tiles; make faces at small
children; drink water / chew gum in an effort to stay awake… if all else fails
you can always read your Bible.
It’s totally ok to
compare. When the bathroom
smells, it’s completely acceptable to look back on the long nights in Nepal and
be grateful that we’re not still using a squatty potty. On the bumpy car rides,
it’s strangely comforting to look ahead to Africa and be grateful that we’re
not experiencing that quite yet. They
spend a lot of time at launch telling us not to compare anything, but hey-
rules are made to be broken, right?
Abbrevs are always in
style. Don’t be jeal that we’re totes the coolest team ever- we’re defs not
trying to make you feel small, but we’ve been through a ginormo amount of
issues and now that everything’s dec we’re just relaxing.
Dad jokes can be cool,
but they’re usually not, so insert them with care.
Failed pasta does not get tossed in the neighborhood
garden in the middle of the night. Enough said.
You don’t have to use
complete sentences. It’s actually significantly more efficient (and
effective) to look at someone and say, “EM-powered” while giving them two
gangsta Es with your fingers. “EN-couraged” gets a one hand throw. “Laviiished”
has no hand motions as of yet, but it typically involves the raising of one’s
voice. The Race gives you a whole new set of vocabulary, with words like
courage, preference and feedback used in just about every conversation,
typically as the whole sentence and with added emphasis (“Hey, want me to put
some honey in your chai?” “PREF-erence!”). The one exception to this rule is
“mo moed,” as in, “you’ve been mo moed!”
Rockstars serve
multiple purposes. Here on Team Considered Lost, we’ve been blessed with
more than enough rockstars to go around. This can be frustrating when they’re
being swarmed by mobs of teenage girls, begging for an autograph or a picture
or a proposal, but it’s quite fun watching them in church, clearly paying attention to the music they don’t understand solely
because of the guys making the music. It’s also helpful for when you sneak into
a bakery and the owner gives you free bread and cake because you performed some
English worship music for him.
If you are not bored.. keep reading.. because there are more lessons learned!
