In the flurry of relentless stuffing and jamming of REI products into my pack for Training Camp, I had no idea the wreckage I would come face to face within myself.
It all started with a late night red-eye flight to Atlanta from Las Vegas. Can I be the first one to tell you, those are not the most enjoyable flights but their cheap! As the rubber hit the tarmac, I was pulsating with a flood of emotions. What is this week going to be like? Are people going to like me? Am I a good enough Christian? Navigating the Atlanta airport at 6am, I had plenty of time to figure out a slew of questions as to how I was going to determine the outcome of this week. Rummaging through the airport in the weee hours of the morning, I found solace in the military organization called the USO. I got my grub and then looked over the ledge to see a mass of broad eyed, backpack thumping world racers amassing. In a way I was ecstatic to finally not be the only one in the airport. However, my insecurities began to rise as the real deal personal encounters were about to come to pass. Swallowing my pride, I aimlessly…or really awkwardly walked up to the group of people and introduced myself! Their human. Im human. Round 1…check. Opening conversation not horrible…check. Laughing arising…heck YES! Slowly but surely more and more future racers amassed and began to take over the Atlanta airport. As brothers and sisters in Christ began to pour in, I began to feel such an ease. People to which I’ve never met were instantly family! Unabridged by our past, and connected by our future, a sensation of warmth imbedded in my heart. They are family now! Getting on the bus to head towards Gainesville, GA the Lord instantly began to pour out his love among us.
Once we hit Adventures headquarters, a mass flood of energy and life began to flow even through the check-in process. Once checked in, I walked down to my camp where “R” squad was at. In what was my first encounter with some of my future squad mates, I purposely tripped and ate it. It was quite realistic and well, nobody believes me that it was on purpose. Now here is where the title comes into play. When I fell and got back up, a freaking Daddy Widow (aka a Daddy Long Leg Spider) was crawling on me. For the life of me I could not get used to calling them a Daddy Long Leg Spider. Their little puffy bodies look so nasty. Ewww. I just can’t even bear the thought of squishing one. Eww. Again their little pea bodies and hair like nasty toes were all over the place. Any who, the little critter from hell decided to hitch a ride as I got back up from my graceful fall. I proceeded to scream like a dude would do and freaked the heck out. After the Daddy Widow was flicked off, the rest WAS NOT HISTORY! IT WAS WAR! So I set up my tent….to my blessed luck, on an ant colony. Ya me! Lol. So waking up the next morning there must have been a revenge of the Daddy Widow conference going on on my tent. Ughh heck to the no!
– Let me get back to the Daddy Widows later.
As camp proceeded, friendships began to form and emotional/spiritual wreckage began to happen. The first day of sessions was incredible. And while the sessions were amazing, I was quite mad for some reason in the midst of it all. I was mad that I had a wall up. A wall that I would not seem to shake. I knew the Lord had a good work for me to do in my life just like he had for Nehemiah, but I was still climbing to the top of that wall at the beginning of training camp unlike Nehemiah who was not overcome by the pressures and heights of the wall he was faced to build. It was tough for me to go from a Biblical and Theological degree paradox where much of the working of the Holy Spirit ceased in the 1st century church to a charismatic environment. With that being said, my eyes were opened to the spiritual workings of the Holy Spirit and freedom in the triune God began to emerge. Inexpressible healing and freedom erupted in my soul and I finally understood what being the hands and feet of Christ looked like.
With undertones of secrecy of the training camp experience, here is a cliché 11 facts about my training camp experience that are fun:
- Bucket showers are legit, and quite fun, especially when a group of men scream like little girls over ice cold water!
- Sleeping in torrential downpour is soothing the clammier you get.
- Spooning revealed to me that I am space heater among 50 people crammed together.
- Airport noise on repeat is a breeze surprisingly to sleep through! I even denied a cupcake apparently! — I never deny food.
- Eating muddy or sandy food is no big deal anymore after my only meal, a dinner sausage, fell on the ground.
- Salami, Peta Bread and Cheese are so yummy while being soaked on a log while resting from 20 miles of pure bliss.
- The “thankful game” is clutch when you’re in a down moment! Holler at your boy Logie-Bear!
- Bromances are real and cannot be destroyed.
- “Letting is rip” has gone to a whole another level of comfortability.
- I’ve realized that sleep is essential and that I tend to become passive aggressive to vehement giggling in the tent next door…*cough* you know who you are. lol
- Bugs love to snuggle with me, eat my flesh, poke me, make me squeal, and get me to dance. I recommend a fly-swatter ya’ll! KILL EM ALL for me!
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Lucky for you all I decided to throw in a bonus:
12. There is so much freedom in Jesus. He has delivered clarity to me! He has filled me with his love and joy. He speaks through me. He moves through me. And He called me to be a servant to those around the globe for His greater glory.
I am not sure how scattered my thoughts are at this point, but the undeniable renewal of a dried soul is just as nourishing as when God told Ezekiel to breathe life into dry bones. My bones are sloppy wet and airy friends! Its not just the humidity speaking. Its Jesus bringing revival to my life! I am sure that Jesus is real more than I am of my own reality. The Spirit of comfort and love has woven himself into my innermost being and declares me alive. I no longer set the Lord inside my emotional and theological boxes. He is free to do what he wills in my life!
For any future racers, embrace the beautiful discomfort of training camp. You will come out comfortably enriched through the humbling experiences you are about to encounter. Most of all, don’t have an agenda for God. Let him direct you!
– To AIM, thank you for this past 10 days! It means the world to me that I am no longer dead in my perfectionist past, but am alive again through the redemptive nature and love of Jesus Christ!
*** Fundraising update: I am currently a little past $10,500. I am trying to get to $11,000 by June 17th. If you would like to donate a tax deductible gift, please click the “Support me” tab. Anything helps friends! Truly, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support!
