Brothers, Sisters, and Friends,
This is a call of hope to
those who are bound. This is a battle cry of the victorious in Christ Jesus to
those who are discouraged and weary. Take heart! He is faithful to deliver. He
is mighty to save. These words we can sometimes throw around with such
lightness and carelessness, but the depth, power, demon-blowing, life-giving,
sustenance that they hold tells of who He is! He is mighty to save. He goes to
battle for us. He has promised to deliver us and He will not relent. He does
not grow weary in battle; He does not tire at the schemes of the Enemy. He is
strong and mighty. Victory is the only way it can end.
I have struggled with shame
since the ninth grade and kept picking it up along the way in growing strength.
Plagued with condemnation and guilt I spent most of my Christian life trying to
convince myself that there really is no condemnation for those who are in Christ
Jesus. Yet it never seemed to sink deep into the soil with the thorns of lies
that the enemy planted. They would choke out ever ounce of Truth. I could not
hear even the whisper of Truth through the yelling of the enemy. Half the time
that he would lie to me – I really wouldn’t even put up much of a fight because
in my eyes, “he had a point.”
Yet these very things drove
me away from deeper levels of intimacy with the God who calls me righteous and
holy because He is. Over these past few months I have spent much time in prayer
alone and with my team working out some of these things in my heart. I knew
full well in my head that what I believed was a lie but trying to convince
myself of Truth did not seem to work! I knew God was getting ready to move
because I could feel all these things rushing to the surface and beginning to
stir. I wanted it all out so bad but I knew in my Spirit to wait on His timing.
Well brethren, the time was
now. Today, which seemed like any other day to me, was the day that God moved
in a mighty way. Through a long chain of events – I lost it today. I cried my
eyes out this morning and then again this afternoon. What seemed like me losing
my mind was God trying to get me to a breaking point where He could move. The
second outburst of the day became my moment of freedom. As I bawled my eyes
out, sadness came pouring out of me in which I cannot describe the depth. All
the shame I had felt in all of time began to come pouring out of me and I began
finding it harder and harder to breath. Joshua, my team leader began to pray
over me and intercede for me as God did His mighty work of removing all the
shame, guilt, and condemnation that had hardened inside of me.
After minutes of prayer I
felt release and I began to just weep in exhaustion and thankfulness that I was
free. God set me free from something I was never called to carry, never called
to walk in. He is good. He is mighty to save. He sets the captives free. He
binds up the broken hearted. He claims freedom for His children. It doesn’t
matter if you have gone to hell and back in this life, there is no pit to deep
that His loving hand cannot reach and pull you out of. There is no problem,
circumstance, or struggle too big for our God.
I begin to strengthen my legs in walking in what feel like new Truths that are
as old as time, “There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,”
and, “My people shall never be put to shame.” (Rom. 8:1 & Joel 2:26)
