I’m overwhelmed. When my to-do list gets too long and looks too lofty, I shut down and ignore the list all together. When I’m stressed out it is seemingly easier to carry the burdens myself than to hand them over to God. I find it hard to pray or even concentrate on the Lord. I know He is there for me, especially in the stormy seasons, but for some reason it can be more comfortable trying to weather the storm and climb the mountains yourself than to say ‘Jesus, take the wheel’.
Right now I’m dealing with reverse culture shock of moving back to the United States, living in a city I don’t know, having no home church or friends nearby, being jobless, attempting to fundraise for World Race, and my father passing away last week. My heart hurts, I feel lonely, and my perspective about the financial goal for the mission is extremely skewed making it look larger than God. To be completely honest, I’m a wreck. I guess every believer has their ups and downs, hills and valleys. I just happen to be in a valley these days. But even here, I will turn my eyes up to the Lord from whom my help comes.
I went to a church with a wonderful friend of mine in Phoenix, AZ today, and I was so blessed by the message. The pastor taught on Exodus 3-4 where the Bible tells about Moses’ meeting with the Lord in the burning bush and his call to return to Egypt and speak to the Pharaoh about freeing the people of Israel. Now, most of us know this story (thanks Prince of Egypt movie lol). The main point I took away from Exodus 4 is no matter what I’m like, my limitations, my circumstances and situations, God IS and He is always with me. Moses listed every fear and reason he could think of not to return to Egypt, but God says, “I will be with you”. But even with this promise, Moses still only saw his mortality, weaknesses, and limitations, and he took quite of bit of convincing on his part to follow through. I don’t know about you, but I can certainly say I can relate with Moses a lot on this. But the Lord is the Great I AM, no matter how we are.
The problem is I tend to concentrate on how I will accomplish things, how I am limited, how I this, I that, I- I- I-… instead resting in God’s presence and letting Him accomplish His will. He promised He would never leave me nor forsake me. But when I concentrate so much on myself and my issues, its easy to forget He is in the midst of everything.
To anyone who is feeling like the problems, circumstances, and mountains are towering and closing in, look a little higher. God is bigger than all of this and He is with you every step of the way!!! Even with crazy insane situations and stormy seasons there is still blessing, no matter how small. So praise Him through the storm, keep your eyes on Jesus while you walk across tumultuous seas. He can do it! Unload the stress at the altar, even if it feels like more work to do so than to keep it bottled. When I look past all the worries of the past couple of months, I see the Lord has set blessing upon blessing in front of me. He has blessed me with good health, family, and provisions. Praise the Lord.
God is so good. All the time, everyday, no matter what, and He is still in control.
~Julita
