Journal Entry: 05/06/2018
I ask for grace, and I ask you to pour out your mercy on me. And before I have a chance to take a breathe and wait on you, I feel a drop. And then another and another. Smiling I look down at my hands, turning them up, facing heaven. I slowly lift them higher as I close my eyes, and as they raise, the rain gets heavier and heavier and it’s like I can tangibly feel you taking over, filling up the atmosphere, leaving no empty space. Your grace falls in waves. Sheets of glory descending at a blink from you, a snap of your fingers changing my life with every drop that touches me. The sound of your blessings is becoming louder and louder, the weight of what you are doing for me gaining weight day by day. Drops are turning into puddles and still it keeps on raining and raining and raining. The water is getting deeper and deeper, things that I used to see are no longer visible. My view is slowly turning into what you want me to see, Lord, nothing is else is clear. Water is rising up over my head and I stand in awe as I wonder what I did to deserve this. So much grace, so much understanding, so much love and mercy and never-ending compassion. I am drowning in it. I’m slowly just drowning and I can’t seem to breathe the same air that I used to thrive on. Water is invading every part of me, my lungs, my heart, the core of who I was and am today, and I’m realizing that the center of my identity is no longer found in me but you, Father. It’s your character and your desires filling me up. It’s your breathe that is keeping me going and your vision that I have such a strong desire to catch a glimpse of. I can’t breathe Lord, I’m drowning in you.
Thank you for taking my breathe away Abba.
