When I was a sophomore in high school, I thought I had my life all planned out. It was actually pretty impressive, how much I had planned and how motivated I was to reach my goals. Then, my eyes were opened to how BIG and limitless our world is, and I realized that what I had planned didn’t even come close to what the Lord had planned for me.
I know that I would be happy and that my faith would grow if I went to college here in Minnesota, and that I would be safe and comfortable. I know that it would be possible for me to serve the Lord here, because there are so many opportunities to serve the Kingdom in daily life, but I just felt uneasy and unsure about staying here.
About five months ago when I felt called to go on the World Race Gap Year, I knew that God was going to have to do a lot of work in my parents’ (especially my father’s) hearts before they were going to allow me to leave them for nine months to do mission work. Part of me doubted that it was even possible. Part of me feared that I wasn’t being called by God and that it was my own desire that was driving me to go on this trip.
Four months ago, I briefly mentioned the trip to my mom who read about it, but I don’t think that she thought I was very serious about it.
The past few months I had been pushing the thought of this trip out of my mind because I didn’t want to get my hopes up. Then, in October, I just felt like the Lord was consistently bringing this trip up everywhere in my life. So I thought, fine, I’ll do some research on it.
Reading about the trip and the mission of the organization made me feel something that I hadn’t felt at any of the colleges we had visited: peace, excitement, anticipation.
I began praying about it again, fearfully asking God if this is what He wanted me to do next year. I knew that the idea of it should scare me and that I should feel hesitant about something so serious, but I felt peace.
When my parents agreed to allow me to apply to go, I knew that God had already worked in their hearts and that He would not let anything hinder what He had planned for me. The reassurance that I felt was astounding.
If God is already doing miraculous things, think about what He will do in the time to come.
I’ll admit, the idea of leaving my friends, family, and comfort of home for nine months to live overseas does make me sad. I know there will be times of homesickness, and times when the longing for a hug from mom or a coffee date with my best friend will feel unbearable, but I trust God’s promise that He will bring me joy and fulfillment if I seek Him with my whole heart.
This call that the Lord has placed on my heart can’t be ignored. Sometimes, God doesn’t call you to be comfortable.
