I expected training camp for the world race to be like Survivior. Yes, scavaging for food, sleeping on the ground, and torches passed out at the end of the night. Luckily there were no torches……
I could tell you about the somewhat uncomfortable sleeping situations that differed night to night, or about the breakfast we were served with minnows being a key ingredient, but instead I'll tell you about what had the most impact on me: A sign from God.
By day three of training camp I was so over the whole idea of this. I kept being told how I would come back a completely different person. Quite frankly, I like me now. The idea of me changing so much I can't come back from 11 months in foreign countries and fit back into my life was terrifying. I was in the woods with people I had never met before, my phone was dead, I had countless mosquito bites, I missed my family, my friends, my dog, and my boyfriend. I was ready to go home and stay there. With this attitude obviously God wasn't revealing himself to me at camp. Even if he would've I would've rationalized it away. So by the third day I called my mom crying saying the World Race was clearly not for me. She told me to talk to one of the staff members about it then call her back. I sat down with a staff member named Katie and my squad's coach Selena and told them I didn't know why, but I just wasn't feeling it. I knew exactly why. Because I wasn't open to anything God was trying to do, I just wanted to go home. They prayed over me and told me to go ahead and leave the worship service and spend some alone time with God to figure out if I really wanted to leave.
The last thing I wanted to do was spend time alone with God. I was avoiding him at all costs and at a place like training camp where the Holy Spirit is so obviously evident, avoiding God is quite a task. So I went down to the dock at the lake and just started weeping. I began yelling at God telling him right now is just not the time in my life for the race and I didn't want to go. I was resentful, and confused, and so disobedient I was ashamed. After I got out all of my frustration I sat down and began praying. I asked God why I was feeling this way if the Race was his plan for me. Then for some reason I randomly asked God for a fish.
A fish.
I asked God for a fish?
I was at a lake. There were tons of fish. And my huge leap of faith was to ask God to reveal a fish to me if I was supposed to go on this mission trip.
That sounds so foolish.
Dumb.
So as I was sitting there waiting for my fish at a completely still, serene lake I felt ridiculous. UNTIL, out of no where, this bird swoops down and grabs a fish out of the lake RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE.
…..
…..
……..
WHAT?!?!?!?!?!
Like okay God, I asked and I recieved, No more excuses. World Race here I come. The rest of training camp was amazing. A deaf man's hearing got restored and I felt and saw God move in ways I never imagined.
God is sending me. And I will Go.
