My heart is full right now thinking about all that the Lord has done for me in these few shorts months I have been on the race. As I am writing my heart moves with joy. It is really hard to believe the person I have become. Before starting this journey I had no idea how wrong I was about who I was. Thankfully correcting that was not up to me.
It is funny looking back and realizing how much needed to happen to facilitate me getting here. I had to be challenged by some amazing people. I had to be real with myself on some things that I needed to work on. I had to really start listening to the Father and being obedient to what He asked of me. Let me tell you that is much easier said than done. Sometimes it means doing something you have never done before and far outside your comfort zone. And then realizing when you live outside your comfort zone it is exactly where you allow God to do His work. It is the kind of work that can only be done through the Spirit. You begin to speak from the Spirit and every word you speak speaks out and directly back into your soul.
Have you ever done something and knew you were exactly where God wanted you at that time? In a place where you had no doubt, even though you were right up against a Red Sea. That is exactly where I am. I felt it before but never it as deeply as I do in this season. I feel I am finally starting to walk in the fullness of what my Father has inherited to me. I have confidence in my voice to speak. I trust that I am genuinely giving love to those around me. I am growing daily. I am feeling the presence of God in a way that I did not know was possible, while realizing there is so much more.
If you knew me before the race, know that the man you will see is no longer who you knew. So please do not expect it from me. I will not be able to give it to you. However, I will bring a newness with me that I hope you will appreciate. I thought I loved you before. I had no clue that it was possible to love you more and with a purer heart. And this is only after 4 months! How much more is out there for me? How much more is out there for you if you choose to truly listen to the Father each day?
This Journey has brought me through some struggles and some storms. I have learned to try to find the joy in it all. I realize at the end of the day every battle I stand with my Father right beside me, victory guaranteed. I presently stand at a battle that on the outside looking in looks pretty dubious. It is the kind I could never win on my own. Most of you who have read my blogs know the battle. As I write I stand 8 days away from my deadline of making $11,000. I am currently at $8522.54. That amount leaves me at $2,477.46 away from the deadline. I do not know how that money will come in. All I can do, and am doing, is trust and have Faith like my namesake Joshua that God can make the sun stand still. By Earthly standards it cannot be done. I am sure you looked at the number and maybe had a moment of doubt. It is okay I understand. Praise my Father that He can always overcome our doubt. Praise to Him for having a really big bank account that has already provided.
I write you this blog so you can see how much the cards are stacked up against me. I want it to really soak in for you. I want you to have that moment where you realize there is no way man is going to do this. There is no way there is even a chance. I smile thinking of when I write the blog about how my Father provided you will have no choice (as will I) but to give him all the glory in it. I wait for that day like a kid seeing a Christmas present with their name on it that they have to wait to open. Knowing that what is in the box will unquestionably bring him joy.
