I struggle with writing blogs, because I will never be able to use words sufficient enough to tell about my experiences. No matter how hard I process, no matter how much effort I put into pouring my heart out, no one will ever truly understand what I have experienced. No one will ever truly know what I have seen.
I choose to believe that the life my Lord has given me is so overwhelmingly good that what I’ve experienced supplies me with enough joy, happiness, faith, and hope to not have to relive or retell my adventures. Still, I make every effort to take what the Lord has given me and make every day an adventure with Him. Choosing to live in the present, neither thinking of the past nor dwelling upon my future. I’m not saying it’s bad to think of the past or the future, but my life becomes unhealthy when I’m finding my happiness and motivation to move forward from moments that are no longer in existence or waiting to exist.
No story is as good retold as when it is originally experienced. While each retelling of a story may be initially impactful to the audience, it becomes less and less emotional and important to the audience and author with each retelling. That’s why I am making the choice to live in the present, because reliving my stories of the past, though impactful to me (the audience), will supply my emotions for only so long before I slip into an emotionally empty being and ceasing to have emotion and story and life with the Author of Life.
Everyday I’m coming to realize more and more that my body is just a vessel for my soul. If my soul is not fed, then my story or next chapter with my Savior will not only go to waste, it will have been missed. I literally feel Life breathed into me every morning by making the choice to do my devotional. It allows me to start my new chapter (my new day) with affirming why I have this faith and why I have this yearning to have the audacious faith that I am called to live out everyday.
Surrender, is what the Lord needs from me. He needs it in every single area of my life. He desires for me to give my all to Him, to put all my Faith in Him, and to put all my Hope in Him. God sees every chapter and moment of my life as well as how it will play out. Yet so often I want to take control. While at the end of each period, He calls me to close my eyes, take a step, and believe that I am His and everyone I know, everyone I care about, everyone I love, is the Lord’s. And He has a plan for their lives just like He has for mine, and if He wants to take them away, or keep them in my life for good is something I cannot worry about. For that’s of the future, and the future holds the present moment I will have when that chapter comes.
Devotionals every morning start my next walk of faith throughout the day, but I need to take multiple courses of action to keep my soul alive, to keep my soul breathing for the Lord. Separate from my devotion, I choose the Word, I choose one of the main suppliers of my faith. Today, I walked with the Lord through Esther, the beginning of Job, and some Psalms. I could take the time to give you a story about what the Lord has revealed to me, but I’m gonna take the road I usually don’t travel and dwell upon it myself and live in the moment. Although, I do think that it is something relevant to me and something that would not benefit you, the readers. So don’t feel too bummed.
Prayer, something I have been horrible at my whole life and have never chose to dive into is another part of how I live in my next chapter. It’s a direct call straight from my soul to the Lord, it’s a lifeline. Being obedient to where and what the Lord wants me to pray for. Specifically it has been placed on my heart to choose one specific, very specific, person each week and pray for them. What for? I don’t know, ask God. How I choose? I don’t know, ask God. Somehow in an amazing spiritual way that person is just laid on my heart and I say ‘okay.’ So I don’t really choose, God does. Not only do I pray for that person, but I pray into my life and what the Lord has for me today and I ask for the strength, love, and passion to live out what He has for me. One of the things I take comfort in, when I have no words left to pray, when all I can do is laugh or cry, the Spirit prays for me. Now that’s cool.
Worship. Whether night or day, 10 minutes or 2 hours, I love to sing praises to my Lord and give Him all the glory because of this incredibly awesome and amazing life I have been given. What does it look like? Sometimes I play my guitar, sometimes I jump around and sing with my team, sometimes I close my eyes while laying outside in my eno and plug in the good stuff (Misty Edwards, Steffany Gretzinger, Bethel, Elevation) and just worship. Out loud or silent, it doesn’t matter, my Lord knows and loves my heart. I choose to live everyday as a servant, doing my duty. It is an honor to worship the Most High King.
As for Africa, you all want to know what Africa is like and what my days look like and what I’m experiencing and all that good stuff. Well here it is, the past 1000 words. This is my Africa, this is my new chapter and this is my today. God calls me to be a servant each and everyday to Him, and I deserve to be the lowest of lows, yet He calls me Beloved. I always want to be reminded of His unimaginable love for me, in everything I do and have done. Every moment of my life needs to be lived glorifying God.
Today, has been an incredible adventure, I love my life. You got to hear about my today, unfortunately you won’t hear about my past until we are chilling and hanging out one day and the Lord supplies me with past memories to share with you in that moment. A story is a precious thing, not to be wasted. So live your life everyday and press into the story the Lord is writing for you in this next chapter, in this present moment.
