Blogging has been tough for me lately. Launch is only one week away and fighting off all those emotions of fear, stress, and grief is becoming increasingly difficult. I’ve realized that there was a lot I didn’t expect when signing up for the race, and I hope that this post will shine some light on the hidden costs of leaving the country for a year.
1. It will hurt
I know the feeling when God first calls you to the Race. I remember it well. God speaks to your heart and you get your acceptance letter and you are on this amazing spiritual high. You are excited for this big adventure, and you cannot wait to follow Jesus to the ends of the earth….at least that’s how it feels until you are looking at the tear stained face of your 7 year old sister when she tells you not to go. Separation is real. Pain is real. As Steven Furticck would say, there is a hidden cost to a high calling.
2. People will act like you are dying.
One week out from leaving, people keep giving me their “last goodbyes” like I am terminally ill rather than leaving for a few months. Happy occasions are tinged with this bittersweet nostalgia and everyone will act like this is your last hoo-rah.
3. You will look your mortality in the face, and it will suck.
While preparing to leave the country, words will come up like “Living will” and “power of attorney.” You will have to make decisions “in the event of your death,” and decide what that means for you. Yout will realize that you are not going to live forever, and that might scare you.
4. You will cherish every moment.
Every little sweet moment and goofy joke from a family member will instantly become precious. You may find yourself tearing up while watching Bones reruns with your mom(Voice of experience).
5. You will realize how little you actually know
What is the difference between a voltage converter and an adapter? What is the capital of Ecuador? What language do they speak in Montenegro? What is chikungunya? What if I get Malaria in India? What are my chances of getting Rabies while abroad? Will I have to eat Guinea pig in Peru? All valid questions. You do not have all the answers, my friend, and that isn’t fun
6. You will realize your own weakness, and you will be humbled
Choosing the Race means you are choosing to see God’s power revealed, but in order to do that, you must first be able to see your own weakness. This season will bring out all your insecurities, character flaws, hurts, and limits. It will stretch you to your breaking point. But in this season, you will learn that in your own weakness, God is strong.
Choosing the Race is not choosing the easy road. It is choosing God first in spite of your own comfort, and that is one of the hardest things you will ever do, but through that, you will see a side of God that you never would have thought possible. It is a side of God that sees your imperfections and says, “I see you son/daughter. I love you. I’ve called you. Follow me to the ends of the Earth and watch me move.”
