So many times in my life I can recall the thought of how nice it would be to see the future. Looking at movies like, “Back to the Future” if I had known the outcome of sport results. I would be able to place bets and make myself a billionaire, or seeing the outcomes to avoid future disappointment. Its thoughts like those that take up a good majority of the forward thinking. However, there are times where thoughts are on my hopes and dreams. The desire to be a Green Beret, which was a dream of mine since the first time I saw John Waynes movie Green Berets. Though they tend to dislike the movie, for the reason of that profession being known as the quiet professionals. The though and idea busting down doors to take out people that are oppressing or hurting innocent people. Rescuing them from the clutches of evil. Being able to be counted as some of the best in the business and apart of a small percentage of Americans to accomplish this feat. This has been a dream and something that I would be okay with dying for.
Then there the thoughts of family, and having 4-6 kids. Majority boys and now my heart has room for a girl. Praying for at most one, while I’m sure some girls on my squad want the vice-versa. I have always had a heart for wanting a big family and even being in a bigger one. Since I was the baby of the family I always had my brother and friends kinda being the kinda picked on. So I always wanted another sibling to pick on and not be thought as the youngest. Though at that age you can’t quite tell your parents to make another child. I always had this vision of me and my wife sitting in our retirement cabin during Christmas with snow outside at the head of a big table with bustling noise of all my family members.
Then there is the dream of owning a business to equip people doing what I am doing with skills that would allow them to be prepared for any worst case scenario situation. Being able to help people who are trying to reach the hard to reach places, and make it out alive.
To me these almost seem like lofty goals, things I could dream of but the final product would be quite how my mind and heart dreamt it. Which I personally don’t think is a bad thing, and also I take James 13-15 to heart as well. “13 Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” 14 Why you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”
So that leads me to the reason for this blog. God has directed me to surrender these dreams, hopes, future, and thoughts to him. I feel that he has asked me to abandon the direct pursuit until he has blessed me with a yes I can do it. I will continue to pursue fitness for SF. I will leave my heart open to him for my potential bride. I will also wait until I have the knowledge and backing for the business, but I will not be Ideal. I will be on the pursuit of God and his Kingdom. Exactly what he asks of us through Matthew 6:25-34
