I posted a (believe it or not) brief version of how I went from the 9-5 life to preparing for life overseas as a missionary. I thought, hey, lets be honest here, people deserve to know the truth about what I’ve been taught throughout the last few years and what the “hard-working American life” has been like for Jordan Rae Adams. Feeling fairly confident I put shameful and ugly things down for the world to read. No sweat, I thought. The following day I logged back on to check my profile.
Nearly 250 people had already read my personal thoughts, past behavior and stupid mistakes! Eeek! Suddenly my stomach was in a knot. Who has read this? What do people think now? Did I just throw my dignity away over night?
But you know what I realized? Ugly must appeal to people. It appeals to me I know that. I’d rather read someones embarrassing history than some polished idealistic version of their “should-have / would-have’s”.
Ugly appeals because ugly is relatable. Sometimes it’s funny, too. Really.
So here’s the deal. I vow to keep my blogs ugly, upfront, unpolished and realistic throughout my missions trip. Does this mean there won’t be extreme positivity and happy days ahead?! Helllllll no. I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn’t believe God has something AMAZING planned for me, and the truth is- we are reaching out to the poorest of the poor. Here’s a couple things I DO expect while overseas.
-Cold showers
-Deep loneliness
-Sickness like you’ve never seen before
-Disrespect simply because I’m a woman
-Disrespect simply because I’m American
And
-A broken heart because I will see people who have been neglected, starved, abused and unsaved. Unknown to the free love Jesus has given them all.
I may only get to spend one month with girls who have been sold to sex slavery. One month with disabled toddlers who crave attention more than food. One month with the community members of Haiti who will never know the convenience of a Hot Pocket that’s ready-to-eat in 2 minutes. (Okay, pump the breaks- that’s a bad joke, but it is true and relatable.. and I’m going to miss microwavable foods.)
-So my point is this, I’m trying my best to prepare mentally for the world I still don’t fully believe exists. My eyes will be opened just has my child-like heart will be crushed and made new. How do you prepare for that you ask? ..I don’t think you do. You just trust that He will be holding you when it all hits the fan. #CultureShock
March 6th Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
Continue on this path with me…I am always before you, as well as along side you. See Me beckoning to you: Come! Follow Me. The One who goes ahead of you, opening the up the way, is the same One who stays close and never lets go of your hand. I am not subject to limitations of time or space. I am everywhere at every time, ceaselessly working on your behalf. That is why your best efforts are trusting Me and living close to Me.
“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.”
Psalms 37:4
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