After the World Race, Summer and I left Boston to prayerfully seek God over the next three weeks about continuing to pursue our relationship. Both her and I seperately had planned on being in Denver; even as very good friends we were excited about being able to see one another again if for nothing else to enjoy actually climbing in the mountains we both knew we loved to be in. Our friendship and love for one another already ran deep after having spent 7 months on the same team discovering our similar passions for sharing Jesus on new and potentially dangerous frontiers.
But with the excitement of being back in the mountains, we knew our time was short. God had been putting a heart for North Africa on her heart; and I knew that I really wanted to be discipled by the men at G42 before walking onto the frontier missions field. And after praying about our relationship, we both found out that our schools happened to be just 12 miles apart in Spain – not just in the same country, but a small bus ride away! But how did that affect us?
As I think of the future, I struggle with the idea of being both able to enjoy this life while knowing that it could end any time. What if God were to take my life or that of my wife or family? What if she develops cancer? What if I become imprisoned? What if my family is taken hostage for me sharing Jesus? That struggle haunts me; I want to know the secret of having joy in the midst of knowing how to deal with the potential of torn relationships or even just growing older.
Tonight as we were having dinner with our new family here in Mijas, I remembered once again that Summer and I chose to take every moment that God gave us in the short time we had in Denver. And that choice brought incredible life to our relationship! Our love for one another grew tremendously as we worked through struggles in our relationship and our walk with God. We learned to pray with one another in a way I’ve never prayed before. And I grew closer to God through the challenges we daily walked through. In short, we lived more life because we knew we only had three months in the mountains before the unknowns of where God was leading us next.
Perhaps that’s part of the answer to my haunting. We have life only when we die. We can truly live life when we accept the risk to be loved by God because we aren’t afraid to use what little time we have on this earth to freely give His Love … and in return become full of life as a result. Not just experience life…but be life through and through!
