I write to you from the Philippines, on my last day here. Well actually my last hours in this country.
When I try to think about the month I have had here, words cannot describe. I was so unbelievably blessed by Kid’s International Ministry this month. To say this ministry is amazing and after the father’s heart would be an understatement. This month I focused on going to feedings and the children’s home, which is just a fraction of what they do here.
The feedings are when we take a calorie packed soup to the poorest parts of Manila and feed as many people as we can. Seeing these different neighborhoods is possibly one of the most sobering things I have seen so far on the Race. And don’t get me wrong I have seen some poverty on the race. But there is something so stark about seeing the skyline of skyscrapers and then walking down the street into a maze of a neighborhood built with scrap metal and tarp pieces-with a trough of waste running along the side walk. Here in the Philippines there is no real middle class. You either have money or you don’t. The feel of each neighborhood can be different. Sometimes you will drive through and all of a sudden there is a hushed silence over the entire neighborhood that you just can’t shake until you drive back out of it. Then you will go to the next neighborhood and all the people are smiling and laughing (which is more to true to the culture in general) and the kids run after the van, so excited to get attention from complete strangers.
Then there is the children’s home. OH MY HEART! I love those children. They stole my heart so quickly! They are so happy, funny, loving, and CRAZY. I spent most of my day up at the children’s home. When I wasn’t up there, they would consume my thoughts and I would be telling my team endless stories about who did what that day. And it has been my favorite place on the entire race. Getting to love on this children all month was more of a blessing to me than to them. There were several that I would not even think twice about adopting (if I was old enough I seriously would). Saying goodbye to those children ripped my heart out. It was probably the hardest thing I have done in my life.
And I tell you all this not to just keep you in the loop about what I did this month, but this ministry taught me so much more than what might appear on the surface. This month God taught me how to be vulnerable. To be vulnerable with the Lord means to allow Him to see every part of your heart, but also to share those parts with Him. To sit with Him in the sadness that consumes your heart by having to tell 20 children that you love them but have to say goodbye. Being vulnerable means actually allowing yourself to love those children with your whole heart instead of holding back for self preservation. Vulnerability means feeling overwhelmed and like you are standing naked in a street when you see the poverty that people live in but they still have SO much more joy than you do. Vulnerability means sharing parts of your heart with a teammate so that you can finally find freedom. Vulnerability means to actually feel.
I am thankful that God did this in me right before the end of the Race so that I can really dig in the next two months and not hold back in any way. Im ready to love some more people! I am so excited to see how God is going to use this new vulnerability next two months in……
AFRICA!
FUNDRAISING UPDATE: I AM FULLY FUNDED!!!!!
Thank you so much to all my supporters who have donated to my trip. This wouldn’t have been possible with out your support.
