I have found myself in a new role and have struggled with what it is supposed to look like. In that quest to sort out the definition, I have been thankful and frustrated at the same time. This new role puts me in a place to fight for others. Fight when they don’t want to. Fight when everything inside of them tells them they aren’t worth it. And sometimes, if I were honest, it is frustrating. Frustrating because why can’t they see that they are worth fighting for. Why can’t they see themselves as I see them.
Then, I become thankful. Thankful at how far God has brought me. Thankful that I am no longer in that place where I don’t see my self as worth it. Thankful that I had people that came alongside of me in all my junk and yuck to fight when I didn’t want to and even when I couldn’t. I am excited for this opportunity because I think this just might be a taste of how God will use me to impact His Kingdom in a more long term way – than just this year.
Perhaps He is preparing me for my Kingdom dream. I have long wanted to provide a place of rehabilitation for at-risk kids. Kids that needed someone to fight for them and tell them the truth about how amazing they are. A place that is safe and warm and welcoming and lovely. A place that welcomes those that are generally unwelcome or unaccepted. A place that gives life to all that enter. A place that builds and shapes life to in turn make those lives a productive part of society. A place that gives hope and rehabilitates worth and value.
Perhaps in this dream, I was a little naive in how it would all look and work out. And even more so, in how the ones needing the worth and value would receive the truth. And as I sat in a small room in Montenegro staring at the faces of those that I am fighting for, it made sense to me. With each word they sang to Jesus, each melody that escaped their lips I became overjoyed at how God sees them and what He is willing to do for them to enable them to see their worth. How He fights for them. Better than I ever could. So much better.
I wish that you could see you as I see you
Deeper than a reflection that fades like the morning dew
I wish that you could know and for yourself, look deep inside
Past the doubt, past the hurt, past the pride
I wish you could see
I wish you could see
That you are loved and have been set free
Free from the junk and the lies that plague
Free to be a warrior, a lifegiver, a sage
Free to help without restraint and love with great sacrifice
Free to look past the circumstances and strife
I wish you could see
I wish you could see the greatness He has called you to be
The foundation He has given you, like the roots of a tree
I wish you could see that the enemy only comes to steal, kill, and destroy
That you not believing the truth is but a ploy
A ploy of the enemy to jade and pervert what is true
What is true about His creation, His joy, His first love – you
I wish you could see
I wish you could see
That He is the lifter of your head
He lifts your head and allows you to see
See Him, see His majesty and grace
See His abundance and love all over His face
For it is when our eyes meet His that we know
In that instance we know
Know that we can believe in who He has made us to be
Know what is true and righteous and free
I wish you could see
