“We have all arrived,” I heard one of my teammates say the other night. “We have arrived, arrived where?” I thought to myself. The more I have spent time thinking about it, the more I realized I have arrived every day of every month in the past 10 months.
We arrive every morning, every time our feet hit the floor we say, “YES!” Yes to ourselves, yes to God, and yes to the ministry we are working for. Saying yes may be one of the most difficult things that I have gone through on the race. I remember saying yes the day I submitted my application for the race. Yes the day I got the call saying I was accepted. Yes the day I boarded the plane with 40 other people in January. My yes has turned into ughs and mmhmms over the past few months. Sometimes when we say YES!, we forget all of the other things that we have said yes to.
I have to remind myself that I said “yes” to change. A resounding “yes” to different food and odd portions. “Yes” to weight gain and weight loss. “Yes” to sweating to death, squatty potties, and bucket showers. “Yes” to the countless mosquito bits and now scars that have appeared all over my body. “Yes” to the spiders, cockroaches, and ants that like to find their way into my things and make themselves at home. “Yes” to sleeping on the floor, the restless nights of sleep, the tossing and turning, and sometimes even sharing the bed with two other people. I said “yes” to ministries that I may not love, but need my help. I said “yes” to long days and hard work. “Yes” to traveling hours upon hours to get to the next “arrival”. “Yes, yes, yes” to walking through swampy leech filled rice fields to love on people in the villages. I said “yes” to smells that have never crossed my nose before. “Yes” to seeing starving and dying people wish things were different. “Yes” to aches and pains that aren't just physical, but emotional and spiritual too. I said “yes” because I wanted to live a life that was a little bit different, even if it was short.
It is easy most days to complain just a little because I am uncomfortable. I can talk about the foods I love and the first thing I want to eat when I get home. I can think about all of the times out with friends, coffee dates, dancing, church and other activities that I want to be apart of, or the ones I have missed. I can tell stories of my family and things I want to do with them when I get home. Recall the weddings, graduations, anniversaries, and births that I was not at home to witness. And believe me . . . I have done all of these things. I daydream, lay in bed at night, and talk around the table with my teammates about these things, but I never want to wish away anything about the present. It is hard not to get caught up in the events and comforts back home and looking forward to what is to come. I have to remind myself that every time say “yes” to those thoughts, that I am secretly wishing away the World Race and the things I experience every day.
The Race is a daily adventure. I will never be able to recreate these 11 months. I most likely wont have the experiences, food, ministry, sleeping arrangements, or community that I have had this year. I have invested my heart into so many places this year. I will have called 11 different countries “home”, 40 other people family, and people around the world friend. I never want to be in a place where I consistently wish away the present, because that present moment only happens once. I don't want to think back saying I wish I would have done things differently. I want to stand in front of myself and say, you did things right, you invested, and loved well. Don't waste time wishing away your day, your job, your family or friends and especially not the calling that God placed on your life. God called me for a season, a season called the World Race, and there will be a day that I wish away the heartache I feel because I am no longer on it. Today I have arrived, don't wish it away!
