“No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” Eleanor Roosevelt
Do you know why this quote is true? Because it goes down to the core of who we are and who we were made to be. It also exposes the most fundamental of obstacles innate within humanity.
I’ve mentioned in previous posts about being somewhat engrossed in Genesis 3 for the past couple of weeks. It’s the story of Adam and Eve being tempted in the Garden of Eden, the choice they made, its ramifications on their relationship with God and the corresponding consequences.
You see, life is about choices. Some might say you’re defined by them, but I would somewhat disagree. I don’t believe your choices define you, but they do express who you are. You can tell a lot about the person by the choices they make…and even more importantly, you can learn a great deal about a person by deducing why they made those decisions.
The motivations and intentions of our hearts are critical to our identity as individuals. Thank God right? If he judged us on the quality of our actions we’d never get anywhere, but he loves honoring the intentions of our heart.
Those closest to me would tell you that, with a few exceptions, I’m pretty even keel. One of these “exceptions” however is a complete intolerance for a victim mentality. In my travels around the world, I’ve SEEN people who were truly victimized. I’m talking hurt, imprisoned, violated, segregated, prejudiced against, even being forced to react to natural disasters. There are genuine, unfortunate realities in this world and we all have our hurts, stories and baggage to deal with.
But there is never a point in time when you do not have the right to decide for yourself.
I guess that’s what I’ve been processing a lot lately. If my circumstances, environment and what people tell me is possible are not in control over my identity and reaction, then what should my “north star” be? I have some thoughts for you:
1) Decide what role God plays in the direction and definition of your life. Does God get the right to give you an assignment? Would you listen if God warned you about a dangerous path? What if God is silent and is just content to let you follow what your heart finds to do?
2) Find a way to articulate the things that are important to you. I’ve seen this again and again that two major obstacles impede our progress to destiny. First, not knowing what’s important leaves you directionless and passionless. Second, living a life where the things that are important to you are missing or devalued can be disillusioning and frustrating.
3) Pick your poison. I don’t mean that as cynical as it sounds…or maybe I do. The truth is, you will have to tolerate something no matter where you end up. Figure out what battles you’re willing to fight…then be done with it. Never complain about things you’re unwilling to help change. Never look at things in terms of what’s been done to you but instead in how you can be a part of collaboration and creative solutions.
4) Choose your allies. I read this on another blog recently and really liked it. You’re going into a warzone with someone, might as well be someone you like. But even deeper than that is surrounding yourself with people who share the things that are important with you. I’m talking values, mutual commitments to certain life practices, things that are promoted, practiced and protected. These people should know you and you should know them. If you can help it, don’t tolerate a hostile environment. A wise man told me: you deserve what you tolerate.
I have always liked Joshua’s charge to Israel: choose you this day whom you will serve, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
