There is perhaps nothing more terrifying to the independent, self-reliant individual than the bottom of the barrel.
All effort in life is spent in pursuit of that which keeps one alive – keeps one “self-sufficient.”
We have been taught, groomed if you wish, to allocate our emotional resources in such a manner as to sustain us in our lives.
We have become such masters of this that every aspect of our lives (including the unpredictable crises that may arise) are somehow covered and accounted for in our physiological and emotional reserves.
It’s a good working system for us and keeps us in control.
It is not, however, the kind of lifestyle blessed or sanctioned spiritually or theologically.
You see, God desires our dependence on Him.
We feel (wrongly so) entitled to our self-reliance even sometimes subconsciously.
I have engaged in mission efforts the past several years and have learned one very valuable truth: everyone hits the wall at some time.
Your experience may not support this generalization, but I challenge you to put it to the test.
Sooner or later, the ‘perfect system’ breaks down.
Sooner or later, the reserves are no longer enough.
The proverbial ‘bottom-of-the-barrel’ is much closer than we all think.
I’ll admit that on World Race, in particular, I expected the ‘wall-hitting’ to come much sooner than it actually did.
My compliments to the fortitude of my peers and teammates for this character trait, it channeled in the right direction, will serve you well.
That not-with-standing, the crossroads has been reached.
The barrel-bottom has been scraped, the reserves have run out.
Spent, done, gone.
The time has come to make a decision.
It’s interesting how faith and trust in God works.
It doesn’t work as a secret trump card ready to be played at a critical moment of truth – something to get you through in a pinch.
It doesn’t work as a battery recharger to get you back to your self-reliant 100%.
It also doesn’t serve to help reallocate your resources to help you survive to the end.
This life is not about survival, it’s about life!
We are not reacted to live at our fabricated, self-reliant 100%.
We are created and designed to live in communion with God and in the trust that He will use us to our ultimate potential.
Trusting in God is not a long-term goal, not a switch to be turned on and off at will.
It is trust for a moment.
Psalm 40:4 says “Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust.”
A continual act, a trust for the moment.
What makes dependence dependence is that it is not reliance on something else.
The crossroad we have reached is this: are you willing to trust God for this moment?
Do you have the faith to believe He can sustain you, strengthen you, replenish you for this moment?
The comparison of our faith to a mustard seed was a more generous analogy in scripture than we give it credit for.
You want to know how to make it when you have nothing left?
When you have eight months of demanding work and ministry ahead?
Trust God for this moment.
See if He comes through (and acknowledge it if He does).
You ask about tomorrow, tomorrow will take care of itself because tomorrow…you’ll be asking the same question again.
That’s just a taste of what it means to depend on God.
It’s scary, it’s risky, it will fight against everything in your being – but it’s your choice.
Lomo de Corvina
