Aren’t you scared of leaving?
Surprisingly this is not a question that I’ve been asked! The reason why I think I haven’t been asked this, is because I have an amazing community behind me! They support me so much, it’s almost unbelievable! But then again, is a calling that God has placed in my heart that my family, my friends, my church family understands. And I thank God everyday for them! And I also know that they pray for me and they support me beyond what I deserve. I am a blessed person!
With that being said, why I am asking this question??? Aren’t you scared of leaving?? Well… It’s because is a question that I’ve been asking myself lately for some reason. As the days are getting closer and closer to launch, I am actually hoping that it wasn’t so close to my last days here at home.
You see, I am now 10 days away from starting this journey!! And I believe that the packing part hasn’t made it easy on me. Since I have a lot of things that I believe that I’ll need next year. And of course, I keep on hearing that the less that I take is the better it will be, however I sit here looking at my stuff thinking that I’ll need it! How I’m I going to be next year if I’m in need of certain things? Or in case they don’t have “this” or “that” in one of the countries that I’ll be going too… What I’m I going to do?? So you see my dilemma? It somehow makes things a bit annoying and crazy!
And of course on the other hand, I start to think about my family. I’m going to miss them like crazy!! Next year I’ll be missing out on the birth of my first nephew! My little sister’s high school graduation! And well.. I feel like I’ll be missing them a lot. So these feelings start to add up and somehow my heart becomes overwhelmed and somehow that question pops into my head. I’m I ready to leave? Aren’t I scared to leave?
At training camp, we were told that we need to learn to mourn some things. Like mourn the fact that I’ll be leaving home and my loved ones behind. And I felt like I have not been on this stage yet because up until right now, I’ve had a lot of peace and joy in my heart. And well, I feel like I am finally on that mourning stage now!
The other day my sister Mely told me something really wise that blessed me. She said that there is nothing to mourn about because this is a new season in my life that God is allowing me to have. And that the family will always be here for me, and that they were joyous for me. And sure they will miss me, but this is something that God has called me on and that I should enjoy it and not mourn. That this is a new season in my life and I should enjoy it with God, and that she and the family would be here waiting for me with their arms wide open when I’ll come back!
She blessed me greatly with her wise words!!
And also in the middle of my crazy emotions, and my overwhelmed heart God reminded me of my calling on one Saturday morning during the prayer time at my church. God confirmed this calling that He has for my life in the book of Genesis 12:1-3. He reminded me of my calling through the calling that He gave to Abraham!
“The Lord had said to Abraham, ‘Leave your country, your people and your father’s household and go to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you; I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and whoever curses you I will course; and all the peoples on earth will be blessed through you.'” (Genesis 12:1-3 NIV)’
God’s call for Abraham involved leaving his country, his people and his father’s household. God wanted to separate Abraham to show and to teach him greater things. God promised Abraham a special land, a great nation through his descendants and blessing that would affect all the nations.
Abraham’s call involved not only an earthly land, but also a heavenly one. Abraham came to realize that his ultimate home was not on earth but in heaven. in heaven he would live at peace forever in a city “whose architect and builder is God”. Until then, he would e an alien, a foreigner, and a stranger on earth (Hebrews 11:9, 13).
Abraham’s call involved both promises and obligations. We must remember that promises are expectancy of things to come, while obligations are the assured and required commitments of an agreement. God required Abraham’s obedience and personal commitment to him as Lord. Which is how I feel, God is requiring my obedience and my commitment to this mission. And this trust and commitment requires for me to trust in God’s word, even when the promises seem humanly impossible. This call that God has given me to go on the race won’t be easy. Leaving my father’s house, my world behind is not easy, and it takes sacrifice. But this is a calling that God has given me, and I am obeying God and I am trusting in Him that He will be the one to take care of my loved ones. The Joy of the Lord is my strength!! And is the strength that I will need on the day that I get on that plane and say “See you later” to my loved ones!
You see, GOD spoke greatly into my heart on that Saturday morning trough His word. And believe me, I still have a uneasy heart at times, and I am still a bit scared of leaving to go on the World Race. But, my heart rests in God! I have peace, I have joy beyond understanding!
I am finally all packed! My 65 liter backpack is completely full!! I don’t know if I packed all that I will need for next year, but I have left it in God’s hands too! I’m sure that if I didn’t pack the necessary stuff, God will provide one way or another!
So…. I have peace beyond any understanding that this is a call that God has given me! And I will not let any fear that the enemy will want to put in my heart sink in because I have a King of Kings who is my Father and He will be the One to take care of me and my loved ones!
God is a mighty God who provides peace beyond any understanding! Love that is mighty and that nobody can provide! and soooo much Joy!!!
Would you let God enter your heart and allow Him to bring Peace, Joy, and Love into your life???
