You guys. The past few weeks have been rough.
I knew this road wasn’t going to be easy. I knew I was choosing what was right over what was easy.
But damn. It’s only week 3.
I’ve had so many “What the hell am I doing?” moments.
So there’s usually one of the following reactions when I tell people about WR.
+ “OMG THAT’S SO AMAZING!” *then asks a million questions* (this one is most common)
+ *shocked face* “You’re doing what?” “Wow!”
+ “OMG I could never do that. That’s so awesome of you!” (which by the way, you CAN)
And then there’s the very small percentage of people who think I’m crazy. And don’t get me wrong.. maybe I am. I’m leaving a great job, a community that I’ve grown to love, a fabulous apartment, a life that I worked damn hard to build. I’m leaving a cushy life in paradise. I’m leaving to live in uncomfortable situations with people I’ve never met in lands I’ve never seen.. all to come back to.. the unknown, a year later. So yea. I get it. It’s crazy.
But you know what I think is crazier? Living a life of fear. Living a life of regrets. Not doing something that you’ve always wanted to do and CAN do. Not doing things because other people think you shouldn’t. Living a mediocre life because that’s what society tells you you’re supposed to do. Knowing you’ve been called to do something but being too scared to follow through. Hearing Him tell you which path to take and disobeying Him. Those things are crazy.
I have a habit of hearing the bad comments in my head. There could be 99 positive comments and 1 negative one, and the negative one is the one that repeats in my mind. I can’t do that anymore. I want to remember my darling friend who is a recent first-time mom and wife who looked at me with teary eyes and said “you have to do this, because I can’t”. And a girl I don’t know well but is a facebook friend who follows my journey who said “your story has inspired me to go on a mission trip too”. And the countless others who have been encouraging, supportive, and loving.
My good friend shared this powerful video with me with a simple note saying “You’re doing the right thing.” https://www.facebook.com/omeletocom/videos/10154295811209494/
Take a few minutes to watch it. It’s so worth it.
To those of you who have supported my “crazy” year after year, I love you with all of my heart. “Crazy” has gotten me pretty far and there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.
xx
JMT
