The thought formulated as I was sitting on a bus headed to Santiago, Chile. We were leaving Mendoza, Argentina for the start of month 9 of the World Race, and we were smack dab in the middle of the Andes Mountains. Almost the entire ride, I was snapping pictures left and right, constantly stopping my Netflix episode to capture the beauty of the mountains. Absolutely incredible. And the scenery just kept changing – rivers, cactus, snow-covered mountaintops, deep valleys, and I just couldn’t stop geeking out. Just ask my seatmate Morgan how annoying I was! Though it was a 9-10-hour bus ride, I would gladly come back and do it again someday. I had taken the same bus ride on the way to Mendoza from Santiago at the end of July, and the bus ride back to Santiago was the first bus ride I was super excited for all Race (not gonna lie, having a bathroom on the bus is also a HUGE win for me after having to pee on the side of the road during African bus rides, but I digress).
I just could not get over how perfect it all was. I kept thinking the scenery couldn’t get any better and then it would. And try as I might to capture the perfection and detail in a photo, I simply can’t. I’ve actually had trouble capturing beauty in photos all throughout the Race because I have had opportunities to see incredible views in many different countries. But this thought I’m getting to in a bit didn’t even really come to me until I was up close and personal with the mountains. The views were truly mind-boggling to me. When I see SUCH amazing beauty, it’s as though my brain stops working. It’s like I can see the view is crazy cool, but my mouth can’t formulate any other words besides ‘wow.’ So I just repeat that over and over again. Yep, just ask my seatmate Morgan. And my brain also can’t fully soak in all it’s seeing. It sees the beauty and intricate detail of every mountainside, but it doesn’t even know what to do. It’s as though my brain wasn’t made to fully process through such things. Maybe that sounds dramatic, but I’m serious.
I think Angie Smith kind of hits the nail on the head when she talks about God’s love and how we sometimes have a hard time comprehending it. Here’s what she says: “It’s not because it’s not true, but because you’re a finite human being trying to comprehend something that you weren’t created to thoroughly comprehend.” Uhhhhh, yeah, okay, I resonate with that. In the grand scheme of things, I’m having trouble processing through some mountains when there are whole galaxies out there to try to fathom, so I’m thinking I maybe wasn’t created to fully understand it all….
So here’s my thought: If my brain cannot even fully comprehend the crazy phenomenal detail of the Andes Mountains, GOD IS SO MUCH BIGGER AND HARDER TO COMPREHEND THAN THE MOUNTAINS. The Andes Mountains are one itsy-bitsy-teeny-tiny part of His creation. And I can’t even comprehend those. During the bus ride and even after, I just keep thinking about how big God is. If I’m that impressed with some little hills, how much more impressed and in awe will I be when I see Jesus face to face?!?!?!?!?!?! And how can my mind even BEGIN to process what God is like?!?!?!
I don’t think we were created to fully understand. We are obviously finite human beings who simply can’t wrap our minds around some things. And I think not being able to understand sometimes causes me to stop trying to wrap my mind around it. I actually feel like I don’t dwell on the bigness of God often enough. It hurts my brain a little bit to try to even understand one tiny attribute of Him. Have you tried processing through the Trinity and how that’s possible? Or what about how He has always existed and always will exist? How about the human body and its complexity? Or how God still loves us and has mercy on us even when we fail over and over again? I don’t get it.
I don’t want to get it. I do but I don’t. I don’t want to fully understand because then He wouldn’t be a God worthy of my worship. I want to fall to my knees in awe of Him because of His bigness and vastness and mystery because that’s where my heart feels free and full of joy. I mean, I hope I get a few more answers when I get to heaven, but I also want to always be learning and trying to understand more. I want to spend more time meditating on the goodness and hugeness of God so my brain gets completely overwhelmed and I can’t help but say ‘Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.’ I don’t even care if I can’t comprehend it, but I want to dwell on it. I want to geek out about how big God is and just sit in awe of the Creator of the universe who made me in His image and loves me. He is far more incredible than the Andes Mountains, which probably equates to approximately .0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000002% of His creation.
He’s huge. He is worthy of your thoughts and your attention, and He is so much better than anything your brain could even try to imagine, but He’s worth trying to wrap your mind around anyway. I promise. Don’t stop thinking about God just because you can’t understand God. Ask Him to show you more of Himself and let yourself be overwhelmed by who He is.
