Yesterday had a lot
of tough moments in it for me. It was
one of those days where I just felt tired and drained – physically, emotionally
and spiritually. I looked out over the
city of Phnom Penh and asked God why I was out here, why was I doing this. It was our day off and we chose to go from
our little village into the city to get some AC, running water, wi-fi and a bed
for almost 24hrs. I didn’t want to go
back. I didn’t want to go back to my
tent and sleep on the ground, back to fighting off mosquitoes and mice and ants and having
sweat literally dripping off of me while I just sit. I wanted to be home, safe and COMFORTABLE.
I know that’s not
where God wants me to be right now though. Yep, right now He wants me in a
little Cambodian village teaching English and playing with some of the cutest
kids I’ve ever seen. He wants me taking
bucket showers and having team time under the stars. He wants me to have those deep conversations
with squadmates and those quiet times with Him.
He wants me to watch Him paint some of the most beautiful sunsets and
listen closely to His voice in the breeze.
He wants me to live
simply, just me and Jesus. I like that plan. Think about the security in that statement,
“just me and Jesus.� He’s really all I
need. Think about the FREEDOM in that.
I can put off
worry. I can put off anxiety. I can put off striving. I can throw comparison and people approval in
the garbage because He’s already told me that I’m enough and that who He made
me is beautiful and wonderful. I can cast back into hell the lies that I’m
not equipped, not worthy, not heard and not important because He continually
tells me otherwise.
Psalm 139:14 tells me that I’m wonderfully
made. John 15:19 tells me that I’m chosen. I Peter
5:10 says that I’m called, strong, firm and steadfast! Psalm
48:14 promises that God is guiding
me. Psalm
57:2 states that I have purpose,
and John 10:10 says that I have ABUNDANT LIFE in Christ.
His promises are
stronger and higher than my thoughts and emotions. They are truer than my feelings and
circumstances; therefore I will choose to live out of those exciting promises
and truths instead of wallowing in my bad moods.
Today a huge storm
came up. Our 2 teams were outside and
then the wind picked up and the rain started coming down. Our first reaction was to head inside, even
run to get out of the storm, but some people
decided to stay outside and dance and play in the rain. It was too good of an idea to pass up. There we were. Dancing. Washing
our hair. Laughing. STANDING in the midst of the wind and
rain.
So when I see a storm I want God give me the grace to stand in the midst of it, even dare to dance and
play in it instead of hiding inside.
That’s really how I want to live my life. I want to dance with Jesus in the rain. I want to soak Him up and live out of the
freedom that He so desperately wants me to have.
No, I don’t always
choose truth and freedom over lies and bondage, but I pray that I will more and
more as I continue to draw close to Jesus.
His ways really are better than our own.
So join with me…
I say we dance in the midst of the storms and give the devil a run for
his money!
“You turned my wailing into dancing; You removed my sackcloth and
clothed me with joy.�
Psalm 30:11
