“Who are you?”
I am a free, worthy woman who can do whatever she wants and fearlessly trusts God has awesome plans for my life.
That’s the top self-affirmation I have; a statement God walked me through and revealed to me. It is my contract and covenant with God. This is both a statement of who I am and where I struggle the most. It is who I am at my deepest, truest self which is precisely what Satan attacks. He attacks the true self in all of us. When we are being who God created us to be, we can do marvelous things and Satan hates anyone who threatens him.
Beginning with my self-affirmation, God has been teaching me to trust His plan and to trust my hopes and dreams. In November of 2012 I was advised to dream again and to dream big, so I signed up for the race. In a gypsy village in Romania God spoke to me through the song “Come Away.” I have a plan for you. It’s going to be wild. It’s going to be great. It’s going to be full of me. He told me I was a change-maker. Last month in Thailand, God broke my heart for those caught in sex-trafficking. But it was Cambodia where God chose to reveal His plan. It has been in Cambodia that He’s asked me to dream even bigger.
It began with one word: safe.
The idea of a safe house had already been swirling around my brain the previous day, so that’s what I began with when I started journaling. I let my dreams go wild and began to envision what my safe house would look like. I wrote down ideas for activities and specific things I wanted in the house. My passion grew as I wrote whatever came to mind.
Two weeks later God gave me more confirmation and more substance. I flipped open to Isaiah 32 to read the next couple of chapters before I went to bed. The first thing I noticed was the chapter’s title: Safe Houses, Quiet Gardens. My heart leapt in my chest as excitement washed over me. There were six ideas which stood out to me:
1. A leader who will carry out justice.
2. Shelter from high winds & stormy weather.
3. Providing water to the thirsty.
4. Shade in the desert.
5. Stand for what is noble.
6. Justice, Righteousness, and Peace will prevail.
Then I read verse 18: “My people will abide in a peaceful habitation, in secure dwellings, and in quiet resting places.”
Not only has this chapter given me a concrete vision for my safe house, but it presented a name: Jerusalem House. I went to bed with thoughts dancing in my head.
The next day was awful; I felt depressed for the second time that week and there was nothing I could do to get out of it, nor did I want to. I retreated to my bed anytime I wasn’t teaching. People tried to talk to me, but I pushed them away, not knowing what to say. Before the race I would have never considered it a spiritual attack, but that’s actually what makes sense. God gives me passion for this safe house and Satan hates it; he doesn’t want me to do what God’s calling me to do. He doesn’t want me to dream even bigger.
Sorryboutcha Satan.
All of the tears you’re causing me will be turned into joy which will continue to fuel my passion and desire to carry out God’s plan for Jerusalem House.
