Fasting. Up until a week ago that word has been like a cuss word in my life. I always got the chills when people talked about it or there was a chance I was going to have to do it. If I decided to do something like Lent, I did things that weren't hard or that I knew I could do without a struggle. I took the easy way out. I made the plans to where they were a win-win situation for me. I came into the race letting my team know that I was a horrible faster. I even asked God not to call me to a fast while I was on the race. I didn't think I could do it, and honestly didn't want to. I'm learning to be careful what you ask God, He's a very humorous man.
Two weeks ago I started reading the book The Circle Maker. It's all about circling your Jericho's, or the things that seem impossible in your life, in prayer. At this time in my life, one of my Jericho's is my support account. I've had about the same amount in my account since I launched and with a deadline coming up, meeting it, and even reaching the final goal of $15,500 seemed impossible. While reading the book, I had my account in mind the whole time. As I was reading, I came across a part that says "if you want God to do something new in your life, you can't do the same old thing. It'll involve more sacrifice, but if you are willing to go there, you'll realize that you didn't sacrifice anything at all." God spoke so loud to me in that moment that I knew right then and there He was about to challenge me.
Peace. I didn't think that would be a word I used to describe my fasting experience. The first day of the fast one of my teammates turned to me and said "you look so peaceful," and I was. I hadn't eaten all day, yet I didn't experience any hunger pains. I was so focused on God that He literally was enough to fill me that day. As time has gone on, I have a peace that is hard to explain. I know I'm taken care of one way or another. I know God has his hand in this and His timing and will are more than enough. I trust Him to take care of me in only ways He can. He's got me and that's more than anything I can ask for.
Along with peace, he's teaching me trust, and to just ask. It's so simple, but so hard for me to remember that all I have to do is ask Him for the things i desire/need. I don't have to ask anyone but my Abba, and my prayers can be simple. More. As simple as that, and He'll still show up. He loves taking care of His children and that includes me. Because of all this, I'm finally understanding Philippians 4:6-7 and what it looks like to live it out. So I’m "presenting my requests to God," surrendering them to Him, and believing that that's enough.
