This past month has been one of ups and downs. It has been full of joy and sometimes even grief. The Lord has brought many people across our path who are daily spending themselves to further His kingdom and serve those who need help. The past couple of weeks we have seen many of those same people get beaten up by the devil and it made me angry. We have asked God to heal, we have asked for favor with political personnel, and we have asked for truth to be revealed in situations. Our prayers were not answered as I thought they should have been and I got angry.
I finally got to the point where I asked God what the point of all of it was. Why ask for healing if He isn’t going to heal? Why ask for favor when it is not going to be granted? Why ask for His truth when situations remain shrouded by lies?
This month has been one where I have asked God a lot of questions, and as of yet, He has chosen to make me wait for the answers. He has been, for the most part, silent. Throughout I have tried to remain faithful in prayer, knowing that God will answer in His timing and when I am ready for the answers. When I asked the above questions He didn’t hesitate to speak however. He said that healing comes on His terms, not mine. That He is working in those situations in ways I can’t even begin to understand. He reminded me that He is in control and nothing happens without His permission. He will bring favor when it is needed and He will reveal truth to set the captive free when it is time. He then had one more thing to say to me: Psalm 73, read it. Remember WHO I AM!
A psalm of Asaph.
Surely God is good to Israel,
to those who are pure in heart.
2 But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
I had nearly lost my foothold
3 For I envied the arrogant
when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
4 They have no struggles;
their bodies are healthy and strong.
5 They are free from the burdens common to man;
they are not plagued by human ills.
6 Therefore pride is their necklace;
they clothe themselves with violence.
7 From their callous hearts comes iniquity
the evil conceits of their minds know no limits.
8 They scoff, and speak with malice;
in their arrogance they threaten oppression.
9 Their mouths lay claim to heaven,
and their tongues take possession of the earth.
10 Therefore their people turn to them
and drink up waters in abundance.
11 They say, “How can God know?
Does the Most High have knowledge?”
12 This is what the wicked are like—
always carefree, they increase in wealth.
13 Surely in vain have I kept my heart pure;
in vain have I washed my hands in innocence.
14 All day long I have been plagued;
I have been punished every morning.
15 If I had said, “I will speak thus,”
I would have betrayed your children.
16 When I tried to understand all this,
it was oppressive to me
17 till I entered the sanctuary of God;
then I understood their final destiny.
18 Surely you place them on slippery ground;
you cast them down to ruin.
19 How suddenly are they destroyed,
completely swept away by terrors!
20 As a dream when one awakes,
so when you arise, O Lord,
you will despise them as fantasies.
21 When my heart was grieved
and my spirit embittered,
22 I was senseless and ignorant;
I was a brute beast before you.
23 Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.
25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.
27 Those who are far from you will perish;
you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
28 But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
I will tell of all your deeds.
Okay Lord, I’m still listening. I know that your ways are higher than mine, Your plans are bigger than mine, and Your love and righteous anger is deeper than mine. So, I will wait until You see fit to move. I will continue to ask until You want to speak. I will continue to pursue Your kingdom on this earth in spite of anything the devil has to throw at me. Because I remember who You ARE and what the future holds. I remember that You are sovereign and I am impatient. I remember that You are loving and I am demanding. I remember that You are sacrificial and I am selfish. Thank you for your sometimes stern reminders, I feel Your love through Your discipline. Thank you for being the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Thank you for holding my hand and upholding me even when I push You away. Surely God is good to Israel!
