I’m learning that things don’t always end the way we expect them to.
I’m learning to let that be okay.
Today, with a heavy heart & after A LOT of prayer, fasting & counsel, I am announcing my departure from the World Race.
This decision was my own, and is not due to recent events (while they have taken a toll on me). In no way am I running from anything, scared, and no, I do not hate the world race or the staff.
Really, I’ve been learning a lot about myself the last five months and who God has created me to be in ministry. I’ve been learning a lot about how I want to do ministry. I feel called to do longer term assignments rather than month by month, and I feel called to root myself in a community. Yes, this is crappy timing. Yes, I wish things were different. God has been teaching me that I have tasted & seen, and he has shown me why he has placed me in seminary & why I feel called to be a pastor. If anything, my time in Nepal has lit a fire under my butt and fueled my passion to bring change in this world.
I am not against missions- in fact, if God has that for me in the future I’m willing! I have just learned that it will need to be an assignment lasting anywhere from at least 2-10 years in order to build a community and to get completely involved in a nation (outside of 1-2 week mission trips to aid Missionaries & other ministries).
I’m sure some of you will be disappointed. It’s bittersweet for me. My heart is with and for P-Squad. They are such excellent people & they have such great hearts for the Lord. While I have used most of my funds that were donated, the left over will go towards these excellent people & their life changing work. PSquad, I love you. Thank you for loving me so well the past 5 months & thank you to those of you who prayed over this with me.
My time on the World Race has changed me & it has changed me for the better. All I can say to those of you who have journeyed with me & to those who have prayed & supported me is thank you. Simply and humbly. Thank you for believing in me & in this. I am sorry if you feel like I have failed you.
None of us saw it ending this way.
If you have further questions or want to hear more of my heart behind leaving, please just ask. I’m more than willing to speak! There is more to this departure, but this isn’t the venue for that discussion right now. What has been said is the major reason. My heart is to be obedient to what the Lord calls me to. Even if it doesn’t always make sense. This, by far, has been the most difficult decision of my life. And yes, I am slightly embarrassed, but I am trusting in the Lord that I have heard his voice clearly & that this is the path He planned.
This week will be my last week on the race & AIM is allowing me to debrief with my squad before I return back to NC for the summer where i will take a break from ministry & seek out counseling before returning to Anderson to pursue my Masters of Divinity.
I love you all. Thank you for adventuring with me. I have deserved none of this, and God’s graciousness allowed me to experience this. And for that, I am forever grateful.
Thank you.
In the words of my friends- peace out, P-Squad. I’ll love you forever.
