Team: New Heights
A-squad had team changes at the beginning of December. That was when I transitioned off of Beauty for Ashes and onto Rooted. I got a new group of five other people to live with, minister with and love.
And then, the day that we traveled from Tanzania to Rwanda, my team changed again. There was a little bit of switching that morning before we got onto the bus that would bring us to Kigali, but I didn’t think that it would affect me. It did, however, and two women were put on Rooted, effectively making it a completely new team altogether.
It wasn’t what I wanted. It wasn’t what I had in mind. Actually, for most of the 15 hour trip from Mwanza to Kigali, the word “mad” was probably an understatement if you were describing how I felt. Truthfully, my reaction was much more extreme than it should have been – I attribute it to being exhausted and emotionally drained – and even when I heard “expect the unexpected” and “be flexible” in my head, I didn’t want to listen.
Both of those things are becoming second nature here on the field. Expectations are thrown out the window pretty early on, and flexibility is probably one of the most useful things you can have. And I would be quick to say that I’ve been decently good at having them, I just truly did not want to apply them to this situation.
I was being selfish. I was acting as though my desires and expectations were more important than everyone else’s. I was acting as though justice was more important than love. It was a day when I wanted to hold tightly onto my rights and what I thought I deserved.
Philippians 2:3 says "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves."
Writing is an outlet for me. I’m no author, but when something is really on my mind, I type out how I feel. After getting to where we’re staying I spent a day praying and typing. The word document that I opened ended up being longer than my college senior thesis paper. A little over the top? Perhaps.
By the end of the document though, I could see what the Lord was teaching me. I had calmed down enough to understand what he was telling me in the situation. I began to no longer look at it through my lens, but through his. I was able to see it the way He did.
I've been learning about trusting God. I've been learning
that I am not wiser than He is. I've been learning that He
has a plan for me.
I had said "Bring it on" and in response He gave me an opportunity to believe these things. To function in their truth rather than just saying that I believed them.
So, here I am, on another new team. We’re called New Heights. We believe that the Lord is going to bring us to new heights and new depths. I know that he has a lot to unlock within us, and we’re excited to see what he does.
It took me a few days, but now I can wholeheartedly say that I welcome misses Kaylynn & Elizabeth into our team family. There is so much that I need to learn from them, and there is so much that they need to bring to our lives. I am excited. I love them a lot and can't wait to spend these next few months with them.
Check out their blogs:
Kaylynn – http://kaylynnloveless.theworldrace.org/
Elizabeth – http://elizabethnettleton.theworldrace.org/
