A month of persistence, obedience, and revelation.
Neither a valley or a mountain top. It seemed to consist more of the steady hiking that life requires of us when we are residing in the inbetween.
We started in Bulgaria for 2 weeks. We had lots of time for rest and had a few great ministry opportunities cleaning up the local area and visiting with special needs children. Before we even set foot in the country the Lord gifted many of us on team Motley with discernment of spirits. We felt the heaviness of a culture that did not know their identity. We spent time in prayer and intercession and began gearing up for our special trip to Kosovo.
After 2 weeks we moved onto the beautiful Kosovo. When we stepped into the country we were immediately stunned by the tangible spiritual presence we felt all around us. We felt a battle was being waged. For the souls of Kosovo and to be honest….. For our own.
When things began to take a darker turn for our team we immediately jumped into action. But most likely in a different way then you would assume.
We spoke truth over one another. Every moment that we felt lies creep in we just proclaimed the opposite. Every time we felt that we needed to fight we rejoiced in the fact that the battle has already been won.
Writing this blog driving out of Kosovo I can let out a sigh of relief knowing the devil did not have his way this month. (Not that he ever gets it anyways cuz lets be honest, we got Jesus)
In fact I firmly believe his plan backfired on him
This month has been a time of stability and growth that I honestly did not believe I would ever encounter in my walk with the Lord.
Ever since I excepted Christ back in high school my journey with Jesus has been nothing short of a roller coaster. And not the good kind. Its sort of like riding the superman at six flags for the first time. Really REALLY high highs and reallllly low lows.
For a couple weeks this month I couldn’t feel the Lord’s presence. When it first happened I was a bit confused and disoriented seeming as I had felt His presence intensely for the couple months prior. My old response would have been one of freaking out and questioning. I used to believe that feeling determined presence.
I also “used to” be someone totally different. Heck I am brand new now. I gave myself away and it is no longer I who live, but He who lives in me.
SO this time when the feelings left and I didn’t feel Him right next to me I did something that made the devil furious…..
I did nothing.
Meaning I didn’t change a thing. I continued to spend time with Him as I always did, I praised His goodness. I filled my soul with truth.
What would have torn me apart in the past only brought me closer to His heart.
I am overjoyed to say that honestly- this world aint got nothing on His love. And Jesus has the power to make the mundane “feelingless” times in our lives something magnificent. The in betweens of life are no longer dreaded. They are now opportunities to be His faithful servants.
Because love is a verb right? Not a feeling. And when push comes to shove our faith is tested in the moments that we need to use our will and push past our emotions.
And you know what the best part of it all is? The feelings associated with His presence did return, and even greater then had come in the past. Along with a realization that He was there all along, He had never left.
All in all this month was one of enjoying God in the “mundane” & learning that feeling does not determine His presence.
And to be perfectly honest it didn’t feel at all mundane. Even doing the dishes, going on long runs, and the every day team times have presented opportunities for rejoicing.
It is for this reason that Life with Jesus is the greatest adventure I have ever embarked on. The littlest and most insignificant of things have become glaring representations of His goodness. And the times void of feelings become moments of reveling in what I know to be true.
Praise be to our Lord Jesus Christ, who lives and reigns forever and ever!!!
Amen.
