This month God is teaching me just how much I need to rely on Him for everything. I say that I trust God, but when the situation arises, I often doubt that He will actually take care of all my needs, especially some of the day to day stuff.
We’ve been very blessed in a lot of ways this month in India, but there have also been some very difficult moments. Last week there was one day where I woke up feeling at the end of my rope. I sat on my sleeping pad trying to fight the voices in my head that were screaming, “I can’t do this!”
It had been unbearably hot for days. We were exhausted from travel and ministry and the process of getting established. The air was thick and heavy and the dust and fumes had placed their hands around my neck, tightening their fingers around my throat.
I stayed home from ministry, lying on a cot in tears as the rest of my team left for ministry, with only one thought in my head. “What if I can’t do this?”
Later that afternoon the air began to change. Grey clouds spread over the sky. That night, God broke open the heavens and poured down rain. Beautiful rain! Rain to cool the earth and clean the air! Just when I didn’t know how I was going to make it, He reminded me that I didn’t have to know. He would send the rain.
At the same time, the rest of my team members, who were just as tired and worn out as I was were feeling the rain as well. They got to sit in a hut for two hours waiting for it to pass. So God not only provided rain, He provided rest.
Monday as we were walking to a shop the sun beat down on our skin and the heat evaporated our words. One of us commented to the pastor’s wife, Hulda, about the heat.
“Tonight, I think, rain come,” she said.
So that’s what God is teaching me this month.
He may allow the heat, but he will always send the rain.
