That was the name my team choose to identify us. I wasn't as thrilled about the name as my other 5 team mates. I didn't quite understand what it meant for us as a group of woman who know nothing about each other. How does that name relate to us? I have spent the last month not liking it. I am ONE day from launch. I leave the country TOMORROW and last night as I sat on a parking lot with my squad and listened to testimony and truth come from so many other's mouths, as I felt my heart beat so hard that I thought it may come out of my chest it all made sense. I stood up and cried and let my heart out to 41 people I have only known a very short time. I stood before them and proclaimed that I am WANTED I am a DAUGHTER of the greatest and most loving father. I am beautifully broken and God is bringing so much healing to my life. I realized God has put us together as a team because we are all broken, we are beautifully broken and He wants us to heal us of that, so that we can go out and heal others who are walking that dark bath of brokenness.
Yesterday was hard for most of us as we hugged our loved ones for the last time before we left. They got into a car and drove off and when we return back to them we will not be the same person they hugged in Atlanta, September 2013. My story has been different than most others but yesterday I watched two people who are not any relation to me drive off and I knew they felt as heartbroken as I did. They have held my hand through some of the darkest moments of the past year and a half and have celebrated some of the best moments with me during that time too. They will be my cheerleaders as I journey through the next 11 countries. They will be my prayer warriors. I am thankful for them. I sat through worship last night and my heart was heavy because I already felt so alone. I am in a room with 200 other people and felt alone. Yes, that sounds crazy to me too as I write it. I sat there and prayed for God to just take that feeling away…
Then He sent a messenger to me. A beautiful messenger. I was so trapped in my emotions that as I sang louder than I ever had and let tears flow down my face I was still having a hard time hearing Him and feeling Him, Then my coach came up wrapped her arms around me and held me….I guess that is all I was needing in that moment, I wanted to FEEL His presence not just hear Him. Then He sent me both. She spoke words to me that I KNEW they had came from Him. He is always here even when He feels so far.
So, as I prepare to get on that plane to South Africa tomorrow and more than ready. I am broken and that is beautiful because MY Father is filling those cracks with his love and forgiveness and guess what? He choose ME. He loves ME and now I get to go into all the nations and make friends with people, and tell them about the best part of my life!
So, this girl is going to come back a different person. I have two of the greatest people to think for pushing me on days I wanted to give up. Praying for me and most importantly, loving me,
Next blog I write will be in Africa…. Keep following along it only gets better from here. 🙂
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God has made this a very good time in my life to send me to the nations. I know some people aren't at a point that it is not a time for you to Go. If you feel God leading you to go but you can't leave please prayerfully consider donating to my trip and "Go" with me to the nations. Your financial donation with allow me to share His love among the nations and you will be going on this journey with me through that donation. You can do that by giving through the SUPPORT MY CALLING tab or by sending a check to me at::
Jena Haney Adventures in Missions
403 Eden Street or 6000 Wellspring Trail
Hickman, KY 42050 Gainesville, GA 30506
