Grandma was a crab. She found many things to complain about. Oh, but I loved her dearly. Some of my favorite one liners were, "You make a better door than a window, that’s dumb, you live out in the sticks and why would you want to do that?” But I know that she loved me, and I truly miss her! The year before she died, I wanted to try to make the most of our relationship. I felt like I didn’t know my grandpa and I just didn’t invest like I could have before he died.
Grandma loved to make doll houses and somewhere along the way, so did I. So we made a mini coffee shop together on Wednesday nights for the last year of her life. I’ll admit that I’m not gifted in loving elderly people. I’m missing the patience for the silence, the one to two word answers and me constantly jabbering on about nothing very interesting. Funny thing is that I built a relationship with a crabby lady who didn’t always make the best choices in her life and often forgot to show love to many people.
Who am I though? I can relate to grandma. I too, know perfectly well how to be crabby. I too, don’t always make the best choices and sadly, I forget to show love on a daily basis. The journey my mom and uncle had to go on watching both of their parents leave this earth was an amazing and painful thing to watch and grow from. It was never perfect and the healing in the family was never complete, but there was some healing. It took a lifetime, but I believe through listening to our simple conversations, that grandma gave her heart to God.
The memories of my grandma will always be connected to my love and passion for surfing. She died the day I was in Florida on vacation with my family. I learned to surf that day. I watched some YouTube lessons and figured I could do that. I went to the beach, rented a board and got brave.
Grandma was never going to be perfect here on earth. She was going to continue to physically suffer and find things to complain about. But the moment I got on that board, I felt I got a glimpse of heaven and just a taste of what my dear old crabby grandma was experiencing in her new transformed body and now able to understand the completeness of the work of Christ.
Just for a moment, I was transformed from my 29 year old self to 10 years old again. It was like when you throw a small child up in the air and she says, "Again, again!" for fear the fun might find a way to it’s end. And your weary body and uninterested adult mind wonder, will this kid ever get tired of this? Do your remember being that kid? I didn't until that day. All I could think was every time I wiped out in the ocean was, AGAIN, AGAIN! When I’m surfing, it is my small glimpse of heaven. It’s why I desperately try to find ways to try to go, just so I can get another glimpse.
I can picture my grandma in heaven with no pain or suffering, just complete joy and no fear of it coming to an end. All because in her heart, though battered and scarred from years of wrestling with having a relationship with God, she was still able to find that He is the only Way, the Truth and the Life. He is more than a glimpse or a taste or a sample. He is forever.
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." John 14:6
“Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners . . . [that] Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life. Now to the King eternal, immortal invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.” 1 Timothy 1:15-17
"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." 2 Peter 3:8-9
Thanks, Tawnya and Anna, for the photo that you didn't know I'd use;)
I'm hoping to catch some waves next year!
