At the beginning of this month God started talking to me about joy. I knew He wanted to show me what it looked like and felt like to live a life with His joy. So, I began asking Him to give me His joy (only makes sense, right?), and this turned out to be a dangerous prayer. Just like people say not to pray for patience because God will put you in situations where you need to have patience, the same goes for joy. Praying for joy did not result in everything going my way or suddenly being surrounded by rainbows, fluffy bunnies, and butterflies, but rather God put me in situations where my natural inclination would lead me to be upset, moody, and downright grouchy, thus forcing me to choose His joy rather than allow my circumstances to dictate it.
To start off with, God put me in a ministry that I wasn't entirely comfortable with, so I was being stretched. I'm not the most outgoing person in the world, so straight evangelism isn't my style, but I'm learning. It was definitely good for me, but when you're being stretched it can be difficult to be joyful, especially when I'm a perfectionist and don't see myself measuring up.
I also have to get my India visa this month, which has been a long and tedious adventure in itself; but filling out all the paperwork for the 3rd time was not my favorite activity. This also meant I would be separated from my team and from dong ministry for a week and have to travel extra, deal with the India consulate, and basically it is altogether inconvenient.
I did my best to take these things in stride, but something was just missing. I don't think my attitude was bad, but I couldn't describe myself as being joyful. I had a suspicion that God wanted to show me more. He wasn't just going to just give me these challenges, I felt like something bigger was waiting…
Friday September 13, 2013
At about 1 am or so I said goodbye to my teammates and boarded a train with my two squad leaders to head to Sebis, Romania to join another team and to rest for a few days before I traveled to Austria to get my India visa. I was warmly welcomed by team Out of Ashes and got to participate in some of their kids/youth ministry.
Saturday, September 14, 2013
I had a very relaxing morning, and spent time reading Colossians and talking to God. During that time I felt overwhelmed by God's love, but in such a way that I could just relax and allow Him to fill me up. I don't have words to describe how absolutely tangible His love felt, just know that it was powerful and very welcomed after traveling. I also got to help with a kids ministry in the afternoon which included singing in Romanian and attempting to follow the hand motions that go along with the songs. Lots of laughter and fun.
Sunday, September 15, 2013
8AM Team Out of Ashes, our ministry host's family, and I piled into 2 vans to head to church.
9AM The second van in the caravan, the van I happened to be in, hit a puddle, lost control, went off the road and rolled twice.
[In the pictures you can see where the van left the road. It then rolled twice and landed on all 4 wheels. All but 3 windows were blown out.]
[Thank you Myers for the pictures!]
The 7 people in the van were transported in the hospital. I was put in a neck brace and forced to lay flat on my back until they could xray my neck, and the doctors and nurses kept talking in Romanian around me and even to me (understandable as I was in Romania), so I couldn't even venture a guess as to what was going on or how my friends were doing. As a person who likes to see and know what is going on around me, especially when it concerns my wellbeing, this was rather frustrating. Ultimately I had a concussion, some bruises, and an abrasion on my neck from my seatbelt. Almost everyone else only had minor injuries. Praise God for seatbelts! BUT two of my friends were in much more serious condition, both sustaining some broken bones among other injuries.
And this is the situation where God decided to show me joy. Almost the entire time that I was in the ambulance, laying on the gurney, getting xrayed, ultrasounded, and just simply waiting, I was laughing, smiling, joking, making puns, and praising God. You see, the situation was absolutely insane, but I saw that God was in control, and I truly trusted in that…more than I ever have. Yes, my friends were hurt, but there was nothing I could do to help other than pray, and trust that God would take care of them. So much more could have gone wrong; God's hand was definitely active in the situation, and my God is bigger than this. He took care of all of us, and is continuing to heal us as we tend to our injuries, no matter how big or small they are.
I walked away from this accident by God's grace, and I walked away with a number of things: some awesome bruises, a seatbelt burn on my neck that also looks pretty sweet, a story of how God works in car accidents that exemplify His mercy, grace, and healing, and the lesson that the joy of the Lord is more powerful than any affliction, trial, or circumstance we face.
