For the last few years I had been vacationing out west. I have been so fortunate to be able to take time off each year and explore much of the Rocky Mountains. Each year after returning from the mountains I would say “One of these day, I’m going to move west”. In the fall of 2018 our Lord created the perfect condition to get me to take that step. He knows our personalities and He sure knew mine. He knew I would not have ever had the courage to make such a large move on my own. Because of my own false perceptions of certain relationships, I was being constantly reminded of painful memories from my past. Let me make this clear, God had nothing to do with this pain, it was the creation of my mind that allowed for this pain to be experienced. God is love, love never causes pain. However, He will use that perceived pain we create for ourselves to serve His purpose. God knows, like many of us, I prefer to take the path of least resistance. Based on my understanding at that time of my life, I had two choices before me. Stay in Michigan and be kept in close proximity to a situation that continued to cause pain, or take the “easier” route and avoid pain by selling my house and move out west, far away from everything. I put my house up for sale.
I have heard that when we are following God’s will, He will make the process very easy. At the time of my decision to sell, I had started, but not yet completely give myself up to serve Him. I was running from something I created, not what He created. I was very nervous about this decision to sell and move, I was full of doubt. Truthfully, I do not even remember praying for His guidance in this decision. He gave His guidance anyway. My house sold in less than a week, cash offer, full asking price and the buyers would give me a month to vacate, rent free. My realtor said he only seen an offer like that one other time in his many years of experience. The ease of selling that house gave me comfort that I was making the right decision, I could not help but thank God for this affirmation. Soon, I would be headed to Phoenix after accepting a travel nurse assignment. You would think this reassurance from God would be all I needed, nope. Doubt would end up rearing its ugly head again very soon.
So I moved to Arizona in November. My first day started well, the first person I met in Phoenix grew up in Taylor Michigan about five minutes up the freeway from where I grew up. That was interesting to me and kinda specific, I mean what are the chances? I took comfort in that. Later that day however, serious doubt and anxiety started to overwhelm me. What on Earth was I doing, sold everything, moved out to the desert, didn’t know anyone, didn’t know the city etc.. I was in a rough spot and this lasted a couple days. One morning I went driving around the city and ended up at a restaurant in Scottsdale. While sitting at the counter a gentleman started a discussion with me. During the course of the discussion he mentioned the book of Acts several times, to the point where I was in my mind like “yeah man, I got it, I should re read Acts”. Within the next day or two I did. Now again, I did not turn to God like I should have when those negative feelings of doubt started to consume me, much like it did back in Michigan. That did not matter, He always knows. While re reading Acts, like I was instructed to, by a complete stranger multiple times, I came across verse 27:12. In my NLT version of the Bible reads that verse as such “And since Fair Haven was an exposed harbor – a poor place to spend the winter – most of the crew wanted to go on to PHOENIX, farther up the coast of Crete, and spend the winter there. Phoenix was a good harbor with only a southwest and northwest exposure.” So I pretty much fell out of my chair, I could not believe how very specific that verse was to my current situation. I love God. I love Jesus Christ. And I love The Holy Spirit. He knows our struggles, He knows our thoughts and He knows our needs. Whether or not we ask of Him, He still provides. How good is our God?
Since then God has placed a multitude of people in my presence that has helped to further me in His plan. So many instances to recall, more than I want to share in this post anyway. Had I not moved to Phoenix, I do not know if I would have grown in my faith in ways that I have, and I do not know if I would have ended up asking for Him to use me in the way He is, by guiding me into The World Race. Anyways back to my point.
I will never forget that moment while reading Acts. Our Heavenly Father wants nothing but a loving relationship with us all. Even though I wasn’t seeking Him during my times of difficulty, He sought me, He cared for me, He loved me. He is doing this for all who do not know Him and to those of us who do know Him, but still aren’t seeking Him as faithfully as maybe they should. Though I had already been Baptized in the name of Jesus Christ, He made it completely obvious He sought an even more personal and intimate relationship with me than what I was currently offering to Him. He seeks that relationship with us all. This is the true love we are seeking my friends. For me, many times in my past I have denied seeking someone, caring for someone, loving someone because I thought they may have been distant. After experiencing this love and comfort from Him during times I may not have deserved it, I can no longer deny that love to another. For who am I to deny that love to someone? If He who is everything, willingly gives that constant love to all no matter their circumstance, so shall I.
My friends I pray that those of you who are doubtful, fearful or hurting in any way, start to realize He is there with you. If you think even the smallest sign may be the presence of Him, acknowledge it, for He does ALL things small and large. We all have to start somewhere. The more we recognize the slight presence of Him in our lives, as our faith in Him grows, He will start to reveal His larger presence. This intimacy is like no other, the Psalmist has it right in Psalm 34:8 “O taste and see that the Lord is good”. And if you have yet to know our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, I pray you come to know Him. Even if your current faith in Him isn’t as strong as it could be, He is still there giving the guidance you need. In some way He has sent a message to care for you, in some way He is trying to show you His love. I promise you this, He never fails. Start looking for the smallest sign. He always knows.
With Love Through Christ,
Jeff
