“It’s not you, it’s me!” Ever hear that phrase before? A lot of times, in the dating context that we associate that phrase to, it’s not true. It’s just used to make the other person feel better and give the person using it an excuse to get out of the commitment. But I think that phrase is very fitting speaking about the church (all believers not a particular group of people or a building). Let me explain – I can already see the puzzled looks and hear the gears overheating in some of your brains trying to see where I’m going with this.
If we’re honest, no matter where the church meets in your community, there’s always something that you don’t like, agree with, understand, or appreciate, as much as some of the other people that seem to not mind or really enjoy. Do you agree or am I just absolutely heretical for even suggesting that as a reality?
In my experience from conversations I have had with people, here are some examples of things that some people particularly may not care for when the church meets:
- The music is too loud!
- The music isn’t loud enough!
- Why are we repeating the same 7 words 11 times? (AKA the 7/11 worship song)
- Why don’t we repeat that bridge more than twice?
- This preacher is too topical in his preaching.
- I wish this guy preached verse by verse.
- There’s too much Greek in this sermon.
- There’s not enough Greek in this sermon.
- I hate the worship dance team.
- Why doesn’t this church have a worship dance team?
- What the heck is a worship dance team (That was always me LOL)?
- I hate how people raise their hands when they sing!
- Why don’t people here raise their hands when they sing?
- We need more coffee areas in the lounge.
- Get your coffee at Starbucks before church!
- These people are fake.
- These people are too real and transparent.
Get what I’m saying here?
So now back to the “It’s Not You, It’s Me” phrase: What if it really IS us and not just something we say to be nice? We have problems with so many of these things and things like it because of a lack of understanding of how one of us connects with the heart of God may not be the same for everyone else. We have a hard time understanding other methods of connecting if it’s not how we tend to connect. That’s true in any relationship. And as a result, we tend to blame the church we go to – what they do or what they don’t do – and the people we interact with. But really, it could all be traced back to ignorance – ignorance about how you connect with God. This misunderstanding can disrupt unity, disrupt your own connectivity with God, and blur everyone’s vision collectively of the main and most important thing – “Thy kingdom come and Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven!”
Why am I telling you all of this?
At training camp we were given seven ways that most people connect with the heart of God. After hearing this talk and identifying the main way that I connect with Him, it made things so clear. I understood why I feel so close to Him in certain situations and not so close in others. I didn’t feel like a horrible Christian when people seemed to connect with the Father and I wasn’t. I was open to new things that could bring God glory and His people closer to Him than the small box I stuffed worship in before. I started to look at my home church in a new light with more understanding to my place there and the different ways they provide people to connect with God. That, “It’s Not You, It’s Me” courtesy became a reality as I started to understand how God wired me for intimacy with Him.
I want to share the list with you in hopes that finding out how YOU connect with God might bring clarity, understanding, a plan for a more intimate time with Jesus, and ultimately unity with the body of believers that you do life with each week!
Before you read this list remember:
- This is not Scripture. These are suggestions of many different ways to connect with God, are formed from the Bible and have many case studies from the lives of biblical characters. So use it as a guide influenced BY God’s word and not a replacement for it.
- You may not just have one. Don’t get confused when you seem to fit in every category! That’s great. BUT, there will be one way that you connect with God above all the others. Focus prayerfully on that.
- The list isn’t rigid. If you’re like me, I connect with God through Worship and Creation in particular. Those can happen at the same time or not – it’s a fluid thing.
Without further ado, here it is:
So which way(s) do you connect with the heart of God?
