Dear Well Wishers, Realists, and Critics,
I am, 100%, undoubtably going on the World Race.
I know this is a concern to some of you, and to be fair, your arguments are rational and logical. I can't deny that I would be giving up a great job that could support myself and a family, I can't deny that I may not get it back when I return. I can't deny that I may come back poor and with no idea what to do next which means I might have to start from scratch and build back up. I can however point out that while we try to rationalise all of this, that's exactly what it is….rational lies.
The problem with this mindset of holding onto security now that I've finally been given it is this: To put it bluntly, if I do not go on this trip, or even if I postpone this trip for a year, hundreds, if not thousands of people could die, and I can't live with that. Sure you could argue that those already going could take care of that but I carry something special in my DNA that God's put inside of me that others may not have and because of that, I can touch people in a way and minister to people in a way that others may not be able to do. There are people out there needing to be loved, fed, clothed, given hope, prophesied into, physically healed, saved, given physical or spiritual freedom, or even raised from the dead that without me on this trip, may not get that and I can't get to heaven, look them in the face, and tell them I'm sorry but I had to earn a paycheck.
I've said it for years and I reiterate, I would rather die with a legacy and kings at my funeral than a paycheck and an empty church.
I respect you all so much and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that you have my best interest in mind and that your opinions are based off of a genuine concern for me but I simply can't preach a victorious gospel and say I believe that when Jesus said things, He meant them, and then turn around and refuse to go to the nations or refuse to believe that He'll always have my back and come through for me, be that financially, relationally, protectionally, or with any other need I may have. He said He'll never leave me nor forsake me and I believe Him. I cried out to Him saying God, I'm not gonna chase money anymore or worry about it, I just want you and trust you'll come through for anything after that and within an hour He gave me a job, 2 raises, and a huge tax return and I trust He'll do the same once I'm back.
The world will never be the same because of what He's going to do through me but good doctrine is nothing more than good doctrine unless it's actually acted upon and I refuse to be a hypocrite so I will go. If it means I come back broken and destitute, I will go. If it means all my life plans get screwed up in the process, I will go. If it means I might get hurt or killed along the way, I will go. I prayed the dangerous prayer, "Lord, send me, do whatever you want with me." and I'm crazy enough to trust that He'll do just that, and I'm ready for it.
It's time.
Best of wishes,
Jedediah Paul Johnson
