This is the official ranking of 11 completely unrelated countries. It is relevant for no other reason than these are the countries I lived in over the past year. Which, in coming from an unemployed, single, 28-year-old dude, makes it exceptionally relevant, and required-reading for anyone intrigued by random rankings of unrelated, arbitrary things, by unqualified authors.
The following list has been compiled through a painstakingly detailed process where each aspect of what makes a country valuable was taken into account and duly analyzed (see appendix below). Through a complex and esoteric process of, offering my opinion, I’ve broken down the ranking of each country into 7 categories, all of which contribute to it’s total score. The categories are as follows: 1) Geographical Beauty 2) Art’s & Architecture 3) Food 4) Cultural Vibe 5) People 6) Tourism 7) X-Factor. As one may assume, the X-factor is what couldn’t be captured by the standard categories, and is something I like to refer to as a country’s “special sauce.” (Needless to say, I mean this figuratively. However, for some countries their figurative special sauce was, ironically, an actual special sauce. For any rule sticklers, the actual special sauces weren’t counted under the “Food” category because they are not food, but a condiment.)As a disclaimer, in each country I spent about 1 month, and the majority of my time during the month was spent either sleeping or serving a local Christian ministry. It should be noted that I did not take into account the impact ministry played into our time in each country, as comparing these would be impossible and unfair. What I will say, is that we had the opportunity serve along side exceptionally loving men and women in each country, all of different tribes, each having come to the same reality that Jesus Christ is Lord, and that He’s good time, you can ask around.
Enjoy!
11) Uganda
Ok, no one likes being last, but there’s no participation trophies being handed out by this millennial, and Uganda is last.
Pros: Kind people and cool things to do. During our time in Uganda we traveled around and got to meet a bunch of different church ministries, which was cool. Also, from a strictly touristic perspective, Uganda has some pretty fun perks. It is one of the top places in the world to do gorilla tracking (which I unfortunately did get to do) and the Nile river, which flows through Uganda, has sections of rapids which make it one of the top rafting destinations in the world (which I did get to do, and it was friggin awesome).
Cons: Wasn’t a huge fan of the food, it was a lot of weird beef, and a peculiar white substance called “posho,” which was gross, fo-sho. Weather wise it was extremely hot, so hot, in fact, that you could cook things in your shorts (we call that crotch-pot cooking). The capital city of Kampala was also not my favorite, as it felt very chaotic and disorganized.
10) Mongolia
Pros: The people that we met and served with in Mongolia were incredible. Some of the closest relationships I built in all my travels were built here, which made leaving very hard. The countryside is also incredibly beautiful, and the nomadic life style still lived out by many of Mongolia’s citizens is a cultural experience unlike any other in the world.
Cons: The food was circumspect at best. One day during the Mongolian version of 4th of July a local friend had us try a popular Mongolian drink of fermented horse milk. Spoiler alert, it was not good. Something else that was frustrating about Mongolia was many people came across as rude and unwelcoming. I got mean-mugged more in Mongolia than in all other countries combined. Also, there was no less than 5 separate instances of random Mongolian men treating the western women on our squad disrespectfully and inappropriately, which was extremely challenging to deal with.
9) Honduras
Pros: The climate and geography of Honduras were beautiful. We were located in a little mountain town called the Valley of Angels, which lived up to its name sake, as the balance of a tropical climate with the temperance of extreme elevation provided a beautiful environment. Days in the 80’s with ample sunshine followed by nights in the mid 60’s – low 70’s was a wonderful backdrop in which to live and to do ministry.
Cons: Similar to other Latin American countries, the gang culture in Honduras is extremely prevalent, which makes travel and life in general more difficult. The capital city of Tegucigalpa was growing and showed positive signs of gentrification, but it was not as nice as the capitals in some neighboring countries, specifically in Guatemala and El Salvador.
8) Sri Lanka
Pros: Sri Lanka’s geography is exceptionally beautiful. Located southeast of the Indian peninsula, this island country has boatloads of nice beaches and scores of bustling coastal towns. Perhaps even more remarkable than Sri Lanka’s exterior are the countries imposing mountains within the interior, which host a variety of quaint mountain villages. The vistas here of the surrounding mountains are truly exceptional, and the small towns serve as fun locations for hiking and nature enthusiasts alike. Also, if you like Indian food, or good food in general, than this is your place, as cheap, delicious curry is in ample supply wherever you turn.
Cons: As a westerner I definitely felt like people were looking to take advantage of me more here than any other country we visited. From the pricing of consumer products, to TukTuk rides, to overt and intentional scams, it definitely felt like people looked at me like they hadn’t eaten all day and I was lunch. The culture was also a lot more disorganized and hectic. For example, there are no such thing as “lines” in Sri Lanka, I had to box-out numerous old men (and regrettably, some old ladies) to make sure they didnt skip in front of my at KFC. In addition, the public bus drivers here are completely bonkers. Although from a glass-half-full perspective, if you’re having difficulty finding urgency in your prayer life, take a ride with a Sri Lankan bus driver.
6 (TIE) Albania
Pros: Food, people and location. The coffee, bread and olives in Albania were all incredible. We lived in a little town outside of Tirana, the capital, and around the corner from our house was a local market that sold fresh bread and produce every day. Within Tirana gyro shops are everywhere, and they are delectable. The people we met here were genuine and kind. And finally, Albania has an incredible location, with a long coastline along the Adriatic Sea, that unlike its neighboring countries is largely undeveloped.
Cons: Albania is a former communist country and the effects of that are still very evident. Tirana, its capital, has undergone significant growth and development since the fall of the communist state, however, much of the dreary, block architecture and dilapidated conditions associated with communistic systems are still evident. Albania is also prevalently Muslim, so sometimes that spiritual framework evidences itself in a very austere and reserved cultural undertone.
6 (TIE) Guatemala
Pros: Guatemala has a beautiful and vibrant culture which dates back to its pre-Columbian roots as the center of the Mayan empire. We spent the majority of our time deep in the jungle serving at an orphanage, so I didn’t have a lot of opportunities to experience the country, but from what we did see, it was incredible. Antigua, a charming city situated at the bottom of a massive Volcano, is one of my favorite cities in the entire world. The combination of Guatemalan culture with Western-Spanish influences makes for a vibrant multicultural hub.
Cons: The weather in Guatemala, especially where we were in the Peten province, was often insufferable. Also, the wildlife was intense. Admittedly, the intensity of the wildlife could be kind of cool. For example, we were woken up each morning to a chorus howler monkey’s going HAM in the neighboring trees. But more often than not, it was kinda annoying, as we regularly found tarantulas the size of dinner plates in our bedrooms, snakes littered the campus grounds, and this is all not to mention the brutal savagery of Guatemalan mosquitoes.
4 (TIE) Rwanda
Pros: Rwanda was in many ways a unique experience as well as a demonstration in the importance of forgiveness and reconciliation. As most people know from the movie, Hotel Rwanda, this small East-African country was the site of one of the world’s most recent genocidal movements. Rwanda has in many ways risen from its own ashes and today represents a bustling country, with a super clean and beautiful capital city named Kigali, as well as a hilly countryside rolling with lush farms and serene lakes. The fortitude and resilience of its citizens is palpable, and is something clearly visible through the today’s social climate.
Cons: On the real, Rwandan food wasnt a whole lot to write home about. For example, I ate A LOT of goat brochette this month, which is a fancy french term for Goat shish-kabobs. And while they weren’t the worst thing ever, they got old fast, and were made worse by the fact that they were, somehow, the best available option on most menus. Not sure if this is a true “con,” but If you’re not a fan of physical touch, you will not like Rwandan children, because they go absolutely ape-nuts at the opportunity to get their hands on some muzungus.
4 (TIE) El Salvador
Pros: El Salvador was probably the biggest suprise of the trip. I loved my time here for a variety of reasons. The people we met were incredible, the landscape was beautiful, and the food was also very good (poupousas galore.) This country also scored exceptionally high in the X-factor category, as I’m not really sure how to put my finger on it, but being in and around the capital city of San Salvador just felt very much like home.
Cons: Similar to Honduras, the overt presence of organized gang life in El Salvador was challenging. We lived in a section of town controlled by the well known MS-13 gang, and because of this we weren’t able to go outside without having our local Salvadoran friends with us.
3) Malaysia
Pros: Geographically, Malaysia was stunning. Located southeast of Thailand, Malaysia is a beautiful island nation with an impressive and very westernized capital city named Kuala Lumpur. Culturally it was also an extremely interesting place. Unlike Thailand, Malaysia is very much a melting pot, with heavy influences from India, China and native Malays. From a touristic perspective, Malaysia was also great, as lodging, food, and travel were all very affordable.
Cons: While the people were very nice and welcoming, the Malaysian state itself posed various challenges in the way it handles religious freedom. The country is predominantly Muslim, which is due in large part to specific initiatives the government has enacted in an effort to discourage religious pluralism.
2) Thailand
Pros: Thailand, is, dooope. Historically, It was the only country in southeast Asia to fend-off European colonization attempts, which is extremely evident in Thailand’s current day cultural climate. Traveling around the country one quickly appreciates the fact that Thai people are very proud of being Thai. During our time here I lived at an orphanage in Chiang Rai while also serving at a nearby organic farm. The Little Farm was a really cool ministry to serve with, as it focuses on therapeutic farming for children escaping abuse, as well as for girls escaping sex trafficking. It was also on this farm, over a small fire, in a little bamboo hut, where our hosts cooked the best food I’ve ever tasted, giving new meaning to farm-to-table (although, we always ate while sitting on the floor, so really it was farm-to-floor.)
Cons: My biggest struggle with Thailand was the deplorable state of the country’s sex industry. On the one hand, it was encouraging that we were able to serve an amazing organization that is helping rescue and rehabilitate young girls forced into the sex trade; however, the sheer darkness of the injustices being committed weighs heavily on your heart. And while sex-trafficking is a problem worldwide, there are various cultural and regulatory reasons why this darkness has a specific hold on Thailand in particular.
DRUM ROLL
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1) Croatia
Pros: Everything, but let’s go ahead and start with its natural landscape. The Croatian shoreline is friggin gorgeous. It’s coast, which neighbors Italy to the North and extends down to Albania in the south, is filled with picturesque islands and charming seaside villages. During our time here my team was tasked with developing new ministry relationships to help host future teams, so we were able to travel and see much of Croatia’s countryside. In addition to its captivating coastline, the Croatian people were very friendly, and the Capital city of Zagreb was clean, safe, and architecturally impressive. Croatia is also rich in history as it has longed served as the historical boundary of what’s considered Eastern Europe. This all is not to mention the food, which was banging, and included the best olives, bread, and citrus I’ve ever tasted.
Cons: nada.
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In summary, this past year has been remarkably gratifying, edifying, and humbling. Over this year I’ve had the opportunity to be a small part of some truly exceptional ministries, which are earnestly and selflessly loving those most in-need. I’ve also had the opportunity to learn much about God, about people, and about this beautiful world he’s gifted us to enjoy. And finally, I’ve been afforded the opportunity to understand what it means to be genuinely humble, as one thing I know for sure, is the fact that travel is a natural panacea for a prideful heart.
Thank you, sincerely, to all those who supported me on this journey. Your contributions have been felt in so many ways, and I am extremely grateful for the financial, spiritual, and emotional support that you have generously provided along the way.
At the risk of sounding cliche, I’m going to sign-off here with 2 of my favorite quotes, as both of them helped promote the ideals necessary for me to pursue this unforgettable and foundational season of life:
- “How we walk with the broken speaks louder than how we sit with the great.”
- “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one’s lifetime.”
Appendix
| Country | Rank | Total Score | Geography | Arts & Archeticture | Food | Culture | People | Tourism | X Factor |
| Croatia | 1 | 31 | 5 | 5 | 4 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 5 |
| Thailand | 2 | 28 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 4 |
| Malaysia | 3 | 25 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 3 |
| Rwanda | 4 | 24 | 4 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 4 | 4 |
| El Salvador | 4 | 24 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 5 |
| Guatamala | 6 | 23 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 4 |
| Albania | 6 | 23 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 3 | 4 | 3 |
| Sri Lanka | 8 | 22 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 3 |
| Honduras | 9 | 21 | 3 | 2 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 2 | 3 |
| Mongolia | 10 | 20 | 4 | 3 | 2 | 2 | 4 | 2 | 3 |
| Uganda | 11 | 19 | 3 | 2 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 2 |
