Have you ever gone on a week or weekend retreat where you were able to take away so much inspiring knowledge and new lessons in life and it changed you forever? How about summer camp when you were young? Or a one class semester in college? It was a temporary season in your life, but you were changed.
Or answer this question: would you rather learn to love someone so strongly and never seen them again or never experience that form of love at all?
Spending time and learning how to love the men and women at Hogar has taught me that it’s better to have loved and lost than to never have love at all. That’s how I see what we are doing in Honduras. We were only here for one month, but one month is better than not coming at all. We may not be here forever, but we are planting seeds of joy in their hearts while theytplanted seeds in ours. You don’t have to be in someone’s life forever to make a difference. Sometimes it’s sharing love to make someone realize they matter, they make have the ability to make others happy, and they are important. It’s only been one month, but they changed my entire outlook of love.
This past month I’ve been serving in a ministry with men and women who are disabled and who have been abandoned. If you haven’t read my blog on God’s Love in Honduras, please read that to get a deeper understanding of the organization. This month, we didn’t verbally share God’s love, we had to be God’s love.
Our standard of happiness is different than theirs. You know marriage is not the meaning of life when many of the men at the home will never get married. However, their life still has meaning. I’m learning love is living in the present.
It’s encouraging them to get up and dance with us even if it’s holding their hands and moving them right to left.
It’s seeing them smile right when we walk through the doorway.
It’s seeing him choose to get up to play golf with us even when he wants to go to sleep.
It’s sitting next to them the whole day, even if they can’t talk, just to let them know they matter and their presence makes me happy.
It’s a simple love language of physical touch by rubbing their back or giving them a massage.
Let me introduce to you the men at Hogar. their ages range from 25-50 years old, but their personality is the age of a child. You may never meet them, but if reading about how they have changed within one month can make some difference to you, then this is all worth it. 
Ines- He has never spoken a verbal word to anyone. He naturally doesn’t talk, but his non-verbal communication expresses so much to the world! When we first met him, he was sleeping every time we walked into the door. He would be lying on the floor of the porch or lying on the couch, and never joined us when we did anything fun. He had no energy and no expressions. I thought maybe he had epilepsy. It was always the norm in the household for him to be sleeping all the time. Then after 2 weeks of us being there every week day, something changed: he was interested in us. We saw him sit up when we came through the door, he started listening to us, and giving us high-fives. Then he joined us on walks, crafts, then to playing golf and eventually being one of the best dancers in the household. We no longer saw him sleep anymore. Now he greets us, gives us hugs, holds our hands and even communicates and helps out the rest of his brothers. Friends.
Franklin- we were warned how he is the happiest of them all in this home. For someone who cannot talk, walk, move any of his limbs, and is fully dependent on his wheelchair and on others helping him, he definitely has a contagious smile -especially every time he saw us. As weeks went by, we saw a difference to how excited and animated he would get around us. We still can have conversations with him in our broken Spanish and he would respond with shaking his head no or nodding yes. He then started teasing us with sticking his tongue out at us and throwing his head back with groans of laughter. He trusts us to the point where he knows he can be playful with us. Friends.
Santos- We never saw his face. He always hid under the blanket in his room with one hole ripped open so he can see who enters his room. We learned he had heavy anxiety and schizophrenia. He would never come out and join us, but he can hear us through the door of his room how loud with joy we had with his brothers. Then suddenly, we walked into the doors of the house one day and there he was just sitting on the couch waiting for us ready to start the day. He was very observant with hesitation, he would look to the door, look to our faces and look down again and repeat, but we stayed with him. We didn’t force him to join our activities, but simply invited him, and we were patient with him. The next day, we walked in the door and we didn’t see him. Suddenly we heard a noise and saw him running down the hallway so quickly to sit down on the couch to be greeted by us. He was excited to see us. And later that day he needed help eating his spaghetti, and he gave me the spoon, and I fed him. Trust.
Juan- All he would do is rock his head back and forth, side to side with no acknowledgement that we were even there. He doesn’t ever talk, unless he moans and groans. I always wondered what he thought in his mind, and as time went on: I would just sit next to him, rub his back, and sing to him. When there is music, he would respond with verbal sounds. Soon, he started holding my hand back. He would hold on and not let go. He would give me eye contact. He would know when we arrived and when we left. He would lift his hand to give me his version of a high-five. He was aware. 
Sammy- When we first met him, he would just sit there. Not really move. Sometimes he would shout words I can’t understand in Spanish, and as time went on, he started responding to us. He would give us high-fives, we would say hola, and he’d say hola. We would say Bueñas Dias, and he would we respond saying Bueñas Dias. He would even try catching the ball and throwing it even though his fingers cannot fully collapse on the ball. We don’t always know what he was saying, but he would always try talking to us and we would listen. He loves back rubs to the point where he would fall asleep and he always says Adios with a high-five when we left. 
Ivon- He was always the most fun to hang with because he responded to us the most. He has down syndrome, but his natural joy is contagious. He was always curious of us, and would stick his thumb up and say “check-aye?” to check if we are okay. We can’t really understand all the words he says, but he would talk to us. He would dance with us, play blocks and pass the ball. He is a unique individual. But as time went on, we noticed how he would take initiative with us more and say hi to us first or is more comfortable to laugh with us. As many of you may know, it is so hard for people to make me laugh, but his natural joy brought me to tears with how jolly he is. He has a contagious laugh and lights up the room. We didn’t know it existed until weeks after we were there. He even went to sleep on my lap. That’s trust right there. I’m going to miss him.
This is Pita and Elsa, their caretakers, or in other words, the Tias of the home. Their passion, love and their intentional energy they put into the men everyday is beautiful. How they utterly care for the well being of the men and are so specific with their time with them is a great example of God’s love toward us. They make sure they carefully put on their clothes, or a hat if they go for a walk, shaves their facial hair, sprays cologne to make sure they smell good, and they talk so sweetly to them even though I can’t understand their language. I am learning what it means when they say love is all the little things. They are not just their caretaker. They love them.
God doesn’t need us. He lets us be a part of this. We don’t know his plan for them after we leave, but I know we planted a seed within them, and the Lord can take it from there. The Tia’s were so sad to see us leave. In Spanish, they explained how grateful they were to have us there. They said we were sent from God and our presence changed the atmosphere in their home and to the men. We gave also gave them relief at times so that they can shower and take care of themselves while we hung out with the guys. They gave us a card and a poster our last day and gave us a dance party. We also gave them clothes and a card that brought them to tears. We told them thank you for welcoming us and teaching us so much about love. We prayed for them and said God is so proud of them. Just because the men’s original family abandoned them, Pita and Elsa didn’t. They don’t have to love them, but they do love them. We may have only been there for a month, but now the men know they always have the ability to choose joy, to choose love, and they know they matter. The Tia’s who are there long term also know they can do the same and their work does not go in vain.
These people will always have a place in my heart. They taught me so much, we too can choose joy, choose love and choose to believe that we matter too. If people who cannot talk, who cannot walk, who cannot move, who cannot get married or be independent can choose joy, love and know their worth, then you too can choose to be thankful, choose joy, choose to believe you matter, and choose love out of the little things in life. Don’t worry about the past or future. Be present.
