It’s been much too long since I’ve blogged, so I’m going to
start spewing my thoughts. We’ll see what comes out…
start spewing my thoughts. We’ll see what comes out…
I’ve been off the field for just over two weeks now. It’s
pretty amazing how that “squad leading thing� is done. Of course I left part of
my heart with those 66 people who are now kickin’ it in Africa, so I guess I’m
not exactly “done.� It’s just much different with me being “here� and them
being “there.�
pretty amazing how that “squad leading thing� is done. Of course I left part of
my heart with those 66 people who are now kickin’ it in Africa, so I guess I’m
not exactly “done.� It’s just much different with me being “here� and them
being “there.�
As I’ve been working and processing through all of “that,� I’ve
recognized how much I grew those four months. Because of the fact that almost
all of my focus was on leading the pack, I had little time to actually
recognize the ways that God was stretching ME. I just knew I was changing. I
think that’s how it happens, though; when we get our eyes off ourselves and
onto HIM, growth just happens. When we have to so fully depend on the Holy
Spirit to get us from moment to moment, HE swoops in, barely noticeable, and
changes our hearts in the process.
recognized how much I grew those four months. Because of the fact that almost
all of my focus was on leading the pack, I had little time to actually
recognize the ways that God was stretching ME. I just knew I was changing. I
think that’s how it happens, though; when we get our eyes off ourselves and
onto HIM, growth just happens. When we have to so fully depend on the Holy
Spirit to get us from moment to moment, HE swoops in, barely noticeable, and
changes our hearts in the process.
Part of my growth came in the form of two amazing women that
now hold my heart. Kim Hillebrand and Kyla Cornelius are two women that walk in
the anointing of the Holy Spirit and their identities in Christ. Let me tell
you, we had our struggles. I had moments of wondering how in the world we were
going to cross over the waters. What I learned is that when each person is
willing to jump into the pool of God’s love, He is able to bridge gaps that are
unbridgeable.
now hold my heart. Kim Hillebrand and Kyla Cornelius are two women that walk in
the anointing of the Holy Spirit and their identities in Christ. Let me tell
you, we had our struggles. I had moments of wondering how in the world we were
going to cross over the waters. What I learned is that when each person is
willing to jump into the pool of God’s love, He is able to bridge gaps that are
unbridgeable.
One of our sweetest moments was in a hostel in Brasov,
Romania where my October 2008 G Squad had stayed about one year prior. It had
been a rough day, and there was some tension that had been mounting between the
three of us. Being that we live in a community of feedback, we dug into each
other. There were hard words spoken. Tears shed. But the best part came with
the three of us lying on a bed, crying out to the Lord for his healing touch.
Romania where my October 2008 G Squad had stayed about one year prior. It had
been a rough day, and there was some tension that had been mounting between the
three of us. Being that we live in a community of feedback, we dug into each
other. There were hard words spoken. Tears shed. But the best part came with
the three of us lying on a bed, crying out to the Lord for his healing touch.
That’s what sisters do. They don’t give in, don’t give up,
and choose to fight for each other, no matter the cost.
and choose to fight for each other, no matter the cost.
It’s quite humbling to recognize the ways the people you
lead begin to look like you, good or ugly. It’s also rather humbling to have so
many mirrors. But I think that all in all, seeing each individual’s shortcomings has helped
me love myself at a deeper capacity. You see, I was able to see the “junk� of
the person and love them anyway. In return, I was able to love me for me; to stop
expecting myself to be perfect, and just start living!
lead begin to look like you, good or ugly. It’s also rather humbling to have so
many mirrors. But I think that all in all, seeing each individual’s shortcomings has helped
me love myself at a deeper capacity. You see, I was able to see the “junk� of
the person and love them anyway. In return, I was able to love me for me; to stop
expecting myself to be perfect, and just start living!
I have more to write, and it will be coming soon. For now, I
want to leave you with a blog from one of the girls on my squad that is
learning what it means to walk hand-in-hand with the Holy Spirit. Please check it out by clicking here!
want to leave you with a blog from one of the girls on my squad that is
learning what it means to walk hand-in-hand with the Holy Spirit. Please check it out by clicking here!
