Thoughts on Training Camp…there are so many!! God has done some amazing things in 11 days. *** Future Racers….dont have any expectations and its going to be vague on purpose!! accept it!
I showed up to TC a day early for a video seminar on storytelling. I wanted to find out more information that would be good for how I document the next year of my life. It was very good information. However, it was hard for me to focus and pay close attention to detail because I had a fever. I showed up with a sinus infection. I was fairly miserable from that alone most of the first week of camp. (I eventually went to the doctor because I thought I had pink eye, turned out to be an infection caused by having 2 contacts in one eye. Who knows how long the first contact had been in there. The second one had only been in for almost a month. (yes, I had 2 contacts. I only wear contacts in one eye and they are monthly contacts.) Luckily once I took them both out my eye was so much better. I still haven’t put in a new contact but I want to make sure my eye is good and healed.
One of the first tests of TC for me was the 3 mile hike. We had to do this in under 50 mins with out big pack on. Mine weighed close to 45lbs. It was physically demanding. There was one hill towards the end that wanted to get me but I over came. I had taken a small speaker and my ipod. I played worship music and helped set the pace for the hike. Once I started the last mile I came across this song called Run to You by Twila Paris cerca 2000 wow hits. It was perfect for the journey I was/am on. I managed to pull my ipod out and put it on single repeat and listened to that song for the last mile. Once I came to that big hill (mind you it was up hill against the wind) I had about 3-4 mins to go to be able to complete it in the time frame. Right as I had rounded the end I was thinking ok God I need you to get me through this, you need to be my legs, and my breath. I have nothing left to give. Or so I thought. One of the girls on my squad came back to run with me to the finish line. I am so grateful for her. When she got to me, I told her I needed to finish and it had to be really fast. I was done and not sure how I was going to do it. We crossed the street and she told me I would have to run and needed to give it my all. I started to sprint and just ran with all I had in me. I crossed the finish line threw my pack off and then threw up and asked for an inhaler. I had trouble breathing. I have what is known as exercised induced ashtma. I finished the race and it could only have been done with God and Paige’s help!
That hike set the tone for the rest of the week. It was a emotional roller coaster. God was tearing down lies and restoring me with truths. I will share one that has been in the coming for about 20+ years. You see, when I was 5, I was adopted by a preacher and his wife. She happened to have the same name and birthday as me. I thought it was kinda cool for the first few years. Then when my life was turned upside down, I hated the name. April of ’98 he came into my room and beat the hell out of me. I had bruises and scars all over my body and neck. (to this day, you can still feel the scars on my neck from him grabbing me). She stood there and watched him. She never told him to stop or protected me. She let him do that to me and then told me to hide it at school the following day. Ever since that I have hated my name. So much so that I had decided I was going to go by my middle name, and I had reversed my first name to Tenaj. (it was like that on FB for security reasons while in Korea, but I had decided I was going to have people start calling me that while on the race). I had 3 different people come up to me 3 different times and 3 different days telling me to reclaim my name. My name means Gracious gift of God.
“Every good gift and perfect gift is from above,
coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no
variation or shadow due to change.”
James 1:17
It was Saturday night, also known as Holy Spirit night. It became one of my favorite nights of camp. We were worshiping and it was right after my mobliizer had walked up to me and told me that I was a gift to the squad and to the world and I needed to take ownership of my name and what it meant. As she prayed over me, I started to sob. I asked the Lord to show me if this is what He wanted me to do. Seconds later people on my squad started to put their hands on me, one of the girls started to pray. I sobbed harder. I told the Lord “if you want me to do this, I need the whole squad on board, I cannot do this alone.” everyone was there. they were all circled around me. There was a song that part of the words at that moment were “I am unfullfilled without full communion” It was perfect representation of what I was feeling. Then I heard “from the head to the heart, you take me on a journey” and then I said to the Lord, I just need one more sign this is what you want. Like what he had given me already wasn’t enough, but He did. The next verses I heard were. I was made by you, I was made for you! I threw my hand up in the air and just let it all go right there in that moment. I heard cheers from the squad and other people in the room. No one knew what was going on in that moment, but they were all there for me. The Lord did some amazing things in the rest of the squad that night as well.
I am in AWE at how close the 58 of us have grown over the last 10 days. But, I know it is just a start. WE have a year walking out the gospel across the world that will grow us together in ways people will never understand. There is just something unique about living in close community that God does things you never thought possible.
At the end of camp we were told of our teams. I have been placed on a team of 6 girls. I love them all so much already. I am so looking forward to doing life with them next year. We will start the race together and will be together the first few(ish) months. My team name is “It is Goode”. I will have a seperate blog introducing them to you later this week. However, you can get to know them by visiting their blogs as well:
Abby Thornburg-Team leader
Rachel Stewart
Klancy Baker
Meg Smith
Jordan King
** I am about $3160 away from being able to leave for India. I have to have this raised by Dec. 16, in order to leave with my team.
*** I am $10,177 away from being fully funded. Please join me in prayer to receive this before I launch so that I can focus on ministry.
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