Here lately, I’ve been anxious thinking about all the things I want to do when I get back, all the people I want to see, what job/work is in store for me, what ministry I want to work towards, and the list forever goes on. I think that is probably why I don’t have a clear picture on whatever/whoever back home because I haven’t fully learned to “let go, and let GOD.” Also, I wonder if knowing would pull me away from where I am now. I would probably miss out on why God has me here.
Not to mention, home is about 3 months away, which is almost perfect timing to start applying for jobs/schooling and preparing living situations. Family and friends are just as antsy to know the answer to the plaguing question, “What’s next?” How do I rightly go back with just a shrug on my shoulders?
Or is it just that the society we live in has become so used to always needing something prepared instead of maybe just hearing from God. I’m not saying that people are anti-hearing from God, I just mean that maybe, us, as a general population; don’t take as much consideration into praying/listening as we should. In fact, some might consider it laziness if I’m not exactly sure where I’m going or what I’m doing when I get home.
It doesn’t help that some people are starting to find out their next step. For the rare few that do know, I hope they also know they are very blessed to have that knowledge.
I guess that’s where boldness and faith come in. I guess that’s where I’ll just be stumped until God deems the appropriate time to clue me in. Ha-ha. I guess I’ll just have to stop guessing. J
While trying to finish this blog, I picked up someone’s ipod and turned it on. This is what started playing:
“Yeah, I trust in you.
I remember times you lead me.
This time it’s bigger now.
And I’m afraid you’ll let me down, but how can I be certain?
Will you prove yourself again?
Because I’m about to let go, and live what I believe.
I can’t do a thing now but trust you’ll catch me.
When I let go.
When I let go. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What is this doubt in me, convincing me to fear the unknown.
When all along you’ve shown, you’re plans are better than my own.
And I know I won’t make it, if I do this all alone.
Cause I’m about to let go, and live what I believe.
I can’t do a thing now, but trust you’ll catch me.
When I let go.
Let go, and live what I believe.
Yeah I can’t do a thing now, but trust that you will catch me.
Cause I am about to let go and live what I believe. I can’t do a thing now, but trust that you will catch me.
When I let go. When I let go. When I let go. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.”
Artist: BarlowGirl
Song: Let Go
Album: Another Journal Entry
