INDIA
I find myself in a country where cold water is a luxury, squatty pottys are the normal and the average temperature is 110 degrees. Sweat has become my constant companion. I want to tell you all about what I have experienced and I feel the best way to give you a look into my daily journal entries.
April 21, 2018
Today I am filled with the Spirit and overflowing with joy from the Awakening conference here in India. I am pulled away by my team after worship and told what we are doing this month. My team was chosen to be the one to backpack through rural villages to preach and church plant for almost 3 weeks. This has been a type of ministry that they have wanted to do with World Race teams for years and have never been able to. Now, because a host for another team fell through, God worked it out to bless us to be the team to be able to do this.
I am beyond stoked and beyond scared. We have NO idea what it looks like. Food? Water? Shower? Bathroom? Are we tenting? Are we sleeping in houses? Dozens of questions flood my mind but I look at my teammates and the excitement trumps all of the worries. This is the kind of backpacking we wanted to do when we signed up for the race! We have been sleeping inside in bunk beds and comfortable homes for a few months and I’m stoked to use my tent finally!
April 23, 2018
India is a beautiful country and that has captured my heart in a way that I never thought possible. During orientation, I am told to always answer people’s probing questions of why I am here with “I’m from America and I am a tourist.” I find myself answering that question more often than I thought. Police officers, strangers, drivers on the highway shouting as we’re driving, and almost anyone who sees the color of my pale skin. I’m a tourist! And I am. Me and 5 other travelers find ourselves backpacking through its rural villages and making many wonderful friends and experiencing such a beautiful culture.
There have been a dozen moments where I look at my surroundings and sit back in awe saying “Yup, I’m not in Kansas anymore.”
April 24, 2018
I have terrible news. We are not using our tents. The generous culture of India allows us to be welcomed with open arms by half a dozen church planters and we sleep in their homes and their churches. Although I am disappointed to STILL not use my tent, I am thankful for the fan that sits above me and my sleeping mat.
Today we are traveling to our first village and will put on our first church service tonight. We left most of our stuff at our base and took only a small day back for our journey. Less clothes, less toiletries, and just less stuff in general. Feels good to pack light. We have a 3 hour car ride to this place that looks like it is out in the boons! 15 minutes into our road trip, pastor tells us to get out. We sit confused and baffled because we thought it was a 3 hour car ride, but we stumble out of the car and follow him. We are greeted by beautiful strangers with flowers and asked to pray over a new well and their church and ministry. So we do! I was unprepared and didn’t have anything to cover my head in prayer so I through my purse over my head and pray. We stumble back into the car and laugh at the random blessing on the side of the road and continue on our way. I have a feeling these next few weeks are going to be wonderful.
April 25, 2018
Today on our car ride to another village, we got stuck in traffic because herds of cows and goats were blocking the road. Only on the World Race. I hope I never lose my sense of wonder of where God has me right now. Tonight I preached on top of a rooftop during sunset. I told them my story of how I came to know the Lord when I was younger and the story of my depression. I told them that God just wants their heart and He wants a personal relationship with them. I hope they do. I don’t know if my words are hitting home or making an impact but I’ll continue to tell of Jesus’ love in my life wherever I go.
Tonight I prayed for a couple that has been trying to have kids for years. They asked for prayer, thinking I have some special power because of where I come from and my heart hurt seeing the desperation in their eyes. But I prayed anyways, and I cried with them hoping one day God provides them with a sweet baby.
April 26, 2018
This morning I wake up feeling absolutely horrible. It’s my teammate Chandler’s birthday and I’m excited to celebrate, but as I get ready for the day, it seems my dinner from last night wants to make another visit. Everyone is downstairs giving Chandler cake for his 27th birthday and I find myself frantically searching for my grocery bag to vomit in.
I have the flu. This could not come at the worst time. Today I miss out on a team game, a boat adventure for Chan’s birthday, and a whole night of ministry. The heat, the lack of medication, and loneliness of this empty church is getting to me. I don’t think I’ve ever missed my mom more. What is it about moms? They are the most comforting and nurturing and encouraging people to walk this earth. My mom is thousands of miles away and probably sleeping. God reminds me that all the qualities that I love about my mom and feel I need in that moment, HE gave to her. Although we call Him our Father, He is a God of all good attributes, including motherly ones. Those qualities comes from God, not mothers. So I run to my Father’s arms and cry, and I am comforted.
I am interrupted by 2 cute little girls, the daughters of the pastor we are staying with. I try and communicate that I’m sick and not feeling well and they run to get their mother and she brings me chai tea. She insists I come downstairs where it is cooler in their house. I oblige and they lead me to their bed and I just sit simply amazed by their hospitality and generosity. They get me food, they get me water, they let me sleep, and they bring cool washcloth for my fever. When I sleep, I have a dream about a beautiful golden retriever running in to cuddle with me and bringing me my nail polish and iPhone. I wake up confused but certain that it was from the Lord and I find enough strength to go upstairs and grab my nail polish and iPhone.
The rest of the night was God blessing me with my own little ministry. They little girl’s eyes grew wide when they say my nail polish and I painted their fingers and little toes. I brought it outside in the cool of the evening and women from all over the village came to hang out and chat and I got to paint their nails too. They point to my phone and say “your family” and I quickly grab my phone and show them photos of my family back in the States. I end up spending hours outside with these women, accepting their cuddles, showing them photos, teaching them English, learning their language, and just staring at the stars in amazement at my God. Although I feel horrible with a fever and the flu, today was a beautiful day.
April 27, 2018
Today we said goodbye to our first host and packed our bags for another village. It is such a beautiful family and they are already so welcoming and generous. They saw how tired we were from our journey and grabbed pillows for us to take a nap. We then took a nap, but not without them watching us the whole time. I’m learning our definition of privacy is a lot different than theirs.
We head to a village nearby to preach- Mike is preaching and he did such a wonderful job. I love watching my teammates step into things that make them uncomfortable and spend the night praying for them as they do.
After each night of giving testimonies and doing worship and preaching, the wonderful pastor of the church plant and his family invite us in for dinner. Tonight we laugh about trying to communicate the amount of food we want on our plates. We will motion for “enough” or “no more” and then they proceed to plop a giant mound of rice and curry on our plates. We attempt to pass our extra food to the men on my team when the host is not looking so we don’t offend them. We spend the ride home reminiscing on the night and what God did. There was a man who walked in half way through the service who I later learned was not able to walk last time a World Race team came to their church, and now he is walking! He still has strength and health issues so we made sure to pray over him again, certain that the next time a World Race team comes, they will get to see him leaping for joy.
April 28, 2018
This morning was a bit different. Instead of waiting till evening to hold a church service, we held one in the morning. I got to hear my teammate Annalise preach for the first time and I sat in wonder of what a strong woman she is. I have seen her grow so much in confidence in the Lord and stepping into things that are uncomfortable. I listened and learned as she taught on one of my favorite passages: John 4.
Afterwards we follow the normal routine of making ourselves available to pray for the church members or anyone who wants prayer. We spend maybe half an hour praying for people and the service starts to die down when a father comes running in holding his 2 year old son. The son is lame and cannot even lift his own head.
We learn that the father is Hindu and is so desperate for healing for his child that he willingly ran to a group of foreigners of another religion that he rejects and doesn’t believe in. I watched as all of our hearts broke for this child and his family. The back of his head is completely flat because his parents have left him on his back since infancy and it has formed to the cold hard ground he has grow up on. I see the desperation in his eyes and I pray. I pray harder than I ever have before, for healing for the child, for the father and his family to see truth in Christ, and for my own heart not to be broken. We prayed again, and again, and again. I didn’t understand. I struggled with confusion and sadness and frustration that God would not heal this poor boy.
For weeks God has spoken healing over me and pushed me towards more truth in walking in the power of the Holy Spirit and here I am, praying for healing, and nothing. Nothing. “You say I have power in your name, you say you want to see all healed and walking in truth, and here I am, fully believing you can do it, praying with all of my might, and you don’t heal him. I don’t get it.” The family thanks us for our prayers and walks away downcast and hopeless. My entire team walks in the church and finds our own corners to cry and scream and pray more.
That little boy will never leave my prayers. I hope I can one day hear of his healing.
April 29, 2018
Today is Sunday morning and I got to share my testimony at church. It was a last minute decision of who is going to be speaking and I volunteered and had about 20 min to prepare. I didn’t know what part of my testimony I would share but I ended up turning to the book of James where my brother Jackson had written a note next to James 1:2-4 for me before I left.
“Consider it all joy my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have it’s full effect that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
His note said “When you meet intense hardships on the race, remember that they have a purpose and God is refining you to make you holier. He cares about you TOO MUCH to leave you where you are at. He wants to show you another side of Him you may have not experienced. I love you JJ.”
I decided to share about my depression and that because I went through that horrible time, I am a stronger woman and believer on the other side. I also shared that Jackson was going through a similar struggle when I left, but he had a better perspective than I did when I was in my depression- he had a James 1 faith. I ended my testimony by encouraging the congregation to have a James 1 faith; a faith like Jackson’s.
The rest of the day was spent with me almost passing out because I didn’t have enough food in me (after throwing up rice and curry you don’t really want to eat it again). But when it’s all there is to eat, you pray God will allow you to stomach it so you cannot pass out again and continue on doing His work.
May 1, 2018
We are at a new location and praising God for the breeze that blows through this property! We already love the family- it’s a small family of 5, but because of their love for Jesus and others, they have welcomed another half a dozen boys to live with them. The language barrier is awkward because we do not have our translator with us, so we spend quite a bit of time just awkwardly staring at each other. It’s fine. We travel to a nearby house church and do our normal preaching. The power goes out and my squad leader Tim is preaching under a single light bulb connected to a generator. I am starting to learn their worship songs and sing along and they laugh with delight at my attempt. At first their singing was really loud and hard to deal with, but now God allows me to find joy. We close the night with the perfect memory of sleeping on the roof under the moonlight and falling asleep to worship music, singing “God, You’re so good.”
May 2, 2018
It’s my turn to preach today. Last time I preached, I taught on what I wanted to teach on. This morning I spend extra time with the Lord asking Him what He wants these people tonight to know. He tells me to share the gospel and do an altar call. I’m nervous, I’m scared, I’ve never done that before.
We walk into the house church and there are 4 people there. “There is no way I am doing an altar call with only 4 people God! That’s awkward and embarrassing if no one decides to come up.” God quickly dispels that silly fear by allowing more and more people to pour into the service as worship and testimonies start. By the time I get up, there are maybe 40 people there. I share part of my story, I tell them about the good that God has done in my life and I share the good love of Jesus and the whole story of the gospel. I have them close their eyes and picture Jesus in front of them, holding out his hand, asking them to give up everything, but in turn they get everything and more.
Because I am timid and nervous about the alter call and kind of assumed that the people there were already Christians, I decide to do 2 altar calls, one for Christians to renew their faith and rededicate their lives to Christ, and one for new believers. I finish my sermon and while their eyes are still closed I ask for people who are already believers to raise their hands if they would like to rededicate their lives to Christ.
Silence. Not one hand goes up.
“Oh goodness God this is so embarrassing why are we doing this? I look like a fool.” I pull myself together and continue and I ask the crowd that if they have never given their life to Jesus before tonight and they realize they want to enter into a relationship with Him to raise their hands. I keep my head down but I hear movement and when I raise my head, my jaw drops in awe. There is was, maybe a dozen hands in the air admitting that they want all that Jesus has to offer. They want to give up their lives they have been living and commit their way to Jesus. I’m holding back tears as I lead them through prayer of confession and commitment. I ask for them all to come up to me and I look them in the eye and tell them “Happy Birthday!” With tears down my cheeks I tell them that God ordained for this crazy American to come to them on this one night and tell them the gospel. I say that I will probably never see them again on Earth, but we can celebrate for I know I will see them again in Heaven! We rejoice over and over again the rest of the night.
The most impactful story, however, that I take from that night is one I found out later from my teammate Chandler. A man came up to him for prayer afterwards and shared that he is studying to be a translator. He heard that Americans were in town so he simply came to the church service only to study how we talk and listen to our dialects and accents, but after hearing our testimonies and about the story of Jesus, he committed his life to Jesus.
I am in awe. I am without words. I am honored and so grateful and just blow away that God would use me like that to bring love and life into people’s life. I have a dozen new brothers and sisters in Christ today because God chose to use me. Is there anything better than this feeling right now?
May 3, 2018
Today was one of my favorite days EVER. Most of our mornings and afternoons are spent relaxing, doing quiet time with Jesus, checking in and doing team time, and waiting till the evening to go out and do ministry. However, today a monsoon decided to come and visit. The power goes out, the windows blow open, rain is pouring inside. The pastor and his wife rush to get their kids inside, and their bunnies, and some neighbors who don’t have a safe place to be. Lighting lights up the sky every 10 seconds and rain pours harder than I have ever seen it before. My teammates take advantage of the rain and decide to dance in it a while before it gets too crazy. As a Californian who doesn’t have a lot of experience with monsoons, I am scared and amazed and capturing it all on my camera. Lighting strikes a tree maybe 100 feet from the house and makes a earsplitting sound. We decide to cuddle up and watch Emperor’s New Groove with the kids of the house. Ministry is canceled and after the rain died down, we asked to make a trip to the grocery store. Our team decided to buy treats and drinks for everyone and I put on my solar powered lamp in the dark and we all sit in a circle and share cookies and candy and soda in the dark.
I suggest playing a game and we come up with a version of hot potato with the lamp. Each time someone gets caught with the lamp when the music stops, we all yell in unison “O-U-T OUT!” The giggles and laughter on this family’s faces is something I have never seen before. Our game turns into an epic dance party and lip sync battle and performance of Disney songs (on our part) and the entire time, the pastor is laughing and video taping with his phone. What a memory. I will never forget this night. I love this family and these people and will be sad to leave.
May 4, 2018
Tonight was a night where we just have to sit in awe of God and say “look at where we are. I never thought I’d be here.” Normally we do church in a backyard or someone’s house, but tonight church is in the middle of the street. I share my testimony, thankful that God is allowing to use my story to impact people I never thought I would ever get to encounter in my lifetime. I pray for healing, for peace, for reconciliation for these women who come to me and ask for prayer. I’m going to continue to pray even thought I don’t see immediate results, I’m going to continue to trust God that He has a perfect plan for these people.
May 6, 2018
It is suddenly hitting me that these are the last days I have with my team Oasis. I have learned and grown so much from them. There have been countless moments of gratitude of me just stepping back and watching them joke together, play with kids when they interrupt their quiet time, and preach from the very bottom of their heart. I’m treasuring these last moments with them, thankful for the 4 months I got to do ministry alongside them.
Tonight our ministry is out in the BOONIES. We drive far and then park the car and then walk farther. There are only a few people and normally that would discourage us, but we are instead uplifted and reminded that God has these specific people here tonight for a reason and we are called to love them, no matter how many!
I listen as the men on my team preach and give their testimonies and I spend a lot of my time praying for the few people in front of me and looking at the stars. After the service, no one comes to me to ask for prayer so I step back and watch my team. There is a women sitting down by the fire, helping cook rice for us all and I sit down next to her and ask if I can pray for her. She has no idea what I am saying but I put my hand on her shoulder and pray anyways. The Holy Spirit rushes on me and I speak a prophecy over her. I feel her pain of brokenness in her family and plead with God to allow reconciliation and peace to come to her relationships. She laughs when I say amen and so do I- language barrier is a trick, but God is still allowing me to minister to this woman, even though she has no idea what I am saying.
We are given a MOUND of rice and curry to consume and we laugh at our attempt to say no to more and turn into silly brothers and sisters putting our extra rice on each other’s plates when they’re not looking. There is a photographer there taking photos and we wonder if we will be in some sort of newspaper or magazines the next day. What a night. So much laughter, so much goodness.
May 7, 2018
We got our saris! Today is our last day of ministry in India and us 3 girls on Oasis decide to wear our saris. We are doing house visits at a nearby village and praying over people in their homes. We come to a house of a little boy who is physically and mentally disabled. We weep for him and pray earnestly for Him, but God leads me to pray for his family that they would not see him as a burden, but a complete joy, complete and whole as he is, someone who brings incredible things to their family.
At another house a man has a wound on the side of his neck that isn’t pretty. I won’t go into detail but there is fluids coming out of it. He asks for prayer and I hover my hand over it and right as I start praying I hear God say “touch it. Cover it with your hand.” I feel God give me the perspective that HE is not deterred by the wounds that we have and He touches them and accepts us. Just as He loves us that way, God was calling me to love this man. I touch this mans wound and keep praying, holding back my vomit that wants to come up. When I finish praying I look in the man’s eyes and see that just by me touching him, that he felt touched by God. Tears begin to fall as we walk to the next house and I’m scrambling to wash my hands.
I am struck with it being our last night, I am homesick, I am weary, and my tears flow more than I would like them to. My teammates cheer me up with singing “Sorry not sorry” on the way home in our saris and stopping to get some delicious street food.
“Ministry” is done but we are still living it out in our lives as we head to Hyderabad for some adventures and days of rest… Then off to Nepal!
Hopefully this gives you guys a glimpse into what life was like during my time in India! I smooshed like 6 blogs into one! Thanks for reading!
All my love,
JJ
