It’s almost 3 days until I leave for my mission trip, and this entire time I’ve wanted to write a blog. The only thing that was holding me back was myself, anxiously thinking of what to write and what people would think of my blog when I posted it. Then God reminded of one of the most important things I learned at Training Camp, which gave me the courage to write and also to write about it.
Ever since I was young, I’ve always liked to act and behave like I was an open book. I wasn’t afraid to speak my mind and worry about what people think, but still respect the people around me. For the most part it’s true that I’m an open book, but there were some pages of my life that I ripped out for no one to read. I was worried about what might happen if those pages of my life and that part of me came to light, and people saw me completely for who I really am. Because of this worry, I put up walls and didn’t reveal certain parts of myself and my past experiences.
This same worry was hitting me when I was about to meet my squad for the first time, but throughout the time I spent with them I noticed something different about them. In the beginning I was afraid I would have to behave the same way as always. I would have to keep the usual walls up and act a certain way, but then I began to notice how open some in my squad started to become.
In the first few days, we broke into groups to talk about the parts of ourselves we tend to keep to hidden. I was astonished how some were so forthcoming and started to open up. It was amazing how honest they were, but most of all how everyone listened with good judgment and with acceptance. I did notice how everyone would view and act differently towards someone after they opened up, but in a sense of being embraced. Realizing this, I felt relieved and safe for the first time to break down the walls I’ve had up for so long. I saw how it brought everyone closer and not fending one another off. Our squad became more accepting and honest with one another the more we opened up.
After seeing this incredible transformation in our squad, I understood that not only did it let us build a stronger relationship with one another, but also our relationship with God. Opening up to everyone allowed God to work through us as a team even more, with strong unity and with Christ being our head.
