I’m scared
of being rejected.
Rejection is
so ugly. And often, its messy too.
But I want
to be 100% truthful with you right now: I’m scared and I live in fear everyday
because I’ve been rejected so much.
Sometimes, I
wake up in the morning and the first thought I have is, “what rejection am I
going to receive today?”
It, literally,
feels like I have a heavy weight on my shoulders and its pushing me down.
I feel like
the kid in the back of the class (or in the back of the picture) that’s never
seen and no one sees me.
Loneliness
is a common feeling.
“No one
understands me” is a consistent thought.
Rejection, rejection, rejection…
…in relationships.
…undergraduate universities (most of them actually).
…graduate schools (14 to be exact).
…dental schools (4 years in a row – 29 schools total but who’s counting?)
…jobs.
…friends.
…family.
…again and again
and again and again.
I’ve been rejected so much that I’ve started to view myself how others see me…”Unfit for the
position/job/etc.”
Rejected so much that it has shaped my personal view of myself.
I’ve
internalized the feelings other people have had for me and avoided
conversations and applications because I’m scared of getting reject again.
But you know
the biggest lesson I’ve learned?
Do you want
to hear the most AMAZING I know?
LISTEN TO
THIS…
You cant put God in a box.
Let me say it again…YOU CANT PUT GOD IN A BOX!
Sometimes,
He says, Wait. I have something better for you!
He has
blessed me with opportunities out of this world. And it wasn’t until later that I was able to see the alignment of Gods plans. AND I LOVE THAT!!
Although, I
was rejected, I was ALWAYS accepted.
In Jeremiah
29:11 it says, For I know the plans I have for you,
declares the Lord,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
And I believe it!!!
Have you ever felt lonely? Rejected? Unfit? Or is
it just me? How did you overcome those feelings?
I
don’t know if this blog will resonate with many people but as always, feel free
to jump right in and let me know what you’re thinking. I’d love to hear from
you!
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