Wow!! What a month it has been in Uganda. It has been such a hard month for me but at the same time it has been such a good month. I think spiritually it was hard but the relationships that I built with the host family were out of this world. Let me tell you a little about my highschool days and then I will tell yopu what God has been doing in my life this month. Starting in 6th grade all the way through highschool was probably the worst years of my life in the since that when I would make a group of friends they would turn on me. They would stop talking to me for no good reason. This was very difficult for me because it made me feel like I was not wanted, nobody cared about me and nobody loved me. Keep in mind this was only due to school friends. This made highschool very hard for me…I felt as though I didn’t fit in anywhere at school. I actually left highschool with no good friends to my name. Ok now that I have filled you in on a bit of my past let me share with you how God has been working in me. This work actually started in Kenya with feeling like I was not wanted here by my team. This was nothing they were doing what so ever it has to do with me not being confident in my identity with Christ. You see I don’t see myself as Christ sees me. I have mentioned in one of my previous blogs that God has called me to be a healer and I am still learning what this looks like because I am not that confident in it. Uganda was a difficult month for me spiritually. I was very discouraged because I was not confident in healing and I just could not understand why. Then God let me know that it is because I am not confident in my identity in Christ. He let me know that until I was confident in my identity I would not fully be confident in healing because that is part of my identity. God was also working in my heart with me not feeling as though I was wanted. I had come to my team with this and let them know what was going on and that I would really like if they would speak truth into me of who Christ says I am. I was very discouraged when I was not seeing this happen. I found out later that they were not doing so becuase they did not know when these lies were running though my head and when to speak the truth. I jus didn’t understand it what I was asking for made so much sense to me. In Uganda God made it clear to me that yes I needed afermation from my team but I needed it from God more. So, this is where I am at right now. I am waiting for God to reveal to me what He thinks of me. I am learning to chose God not matter what. I have realized that what I was hearing (I am not wanted) are lies from satan and they are not of God. I am now seeking god and listening for Him to speak. I can’t believe that month two is over but I am excited to see where God takes me next month and the months to follow.
